Tuesday, January 15, 2008

CONGA LINE OF SUCKHOLES

HEY and Happy New Year,

It has certainly started well with the usual Conga Line of Suckholes lining up to lickspittle and farewell a light fingered, morally devoid, semi deity as he shakes off his mortal coil.

As a skeptic, the faithful who proclaim their faith loudest yet display none of the normal compassion found in rational human beings always amaze me. If they truly believe there is a great judgment day coming (without or without virgins as per your myth of choice) then for the vast majority of these ethically challenged, oxygen thieves, death must hold particular terrors. Yesterday, upon hearing the latest news, I could not help but of think of the scene from “Ghost” where black nasty looking shadows claw the evil doer down to the pits of hell upon his death. All things considered it would seem a fair outcome to me. I wonder if the night terrors ever make sleep difficult those responsible for the so called “LAPINDO Mudflow”.

In a stunning display of little has really been reformed in this country since the heady violent and brutal days of 1998, our Conga Line of Suckholes included some of the highest members of today’s government and virtually to a man/woman called on the nation to remember “the good” the little “deity” had done despite his faults. It seems the idea of a government for the people is a concept that really has not caught on yet (or will ever?). No self respecting democrat would be caught within a hundred miles of this particular nasty piece of work (that should have included ex-PM Keating, Australia’s own self proclaimed, self important, piss ant deity)

I guess I must be missing something! The Good?. A nation overflowing with natural and human resources still cannot provide even the most basic standards of living to its citizens after decades of independence. All this human misery courtesy of the said deity, his cronies and his slavering, powerful and corrupt minions who enjoyed and continue to enjoy luxuries and decadence that would embarrass a Roman Emperor hosting the Annual Gay Mardi Gra and Orgy.

Despite the claims by him, his ilk and the newest version of neo-nationalists that Indonesia’s plight is the entire fault of those evil West/Chinese/Singaporeans/Malaysians (and on and on…and on), the plight of the country lies solely at the feet of him and his fellow leeches. If ever a country squandered an opportunity over the last sixty years it is Indonesia. Countries that started from far lower points in their history in the past sixty years are now regional if not world power houses whilst Indonesian Neo Nationalists still try and pedal the “poor bugger me” line whilst lining their pockets with ill gotten gains. Japan, Korea (South not the nutty end), spring to mind of countries that started from a far worse position than Indonesia and without the natural advantages. I would put India in as well but they are on my sh*t list as their cricket team is bunch of whinging, racist morons.

Oh well, it provides good writing fodder. Speaking of writing fodder, expatriates cannot vote in the local elections whitch is a bugger as I already have the t-shirt. Never the less, I want to throw my hat in the ring for current "Mr. Vice" to be the next President. This guy is an absolute hoot and a never ending source of material! Mr Vice demonstrated his insane grip on the democratic process by complaining in China that democracy is bad for business because human rights get in the way (Pesky little peasants). Perhaps we should use..mmmm Russia as an example of the ideal business environment..tee hee. Being multi talented (which in this case means he has the ability to remain upright and not burst out laughing as he says these things), his answer to the tourism crisis in Indonesia was to suggest Arabs come for a holiday, marry an Indonesian Woman for the period of their holiday then divorce and go home free, clear and with the bags empty. Apparently there is a religious loophole (isn’t there always) to be exploited for a quickie marriage and divorce as required.

In closing, it seems today’s sign off can only be in the words of the immortal song “Say Goodbye to it All”


P.S. For treespotter and GJ.. Standby Cricket (The game God watches when she gets too many opposite prayers) Post on the way. In the meantime the best ever cricketing sledge.

Glenn McGrath (bowling to portly Zimbabwean chicken farmer Eddo Brandes):
"Hey Eddo, why are you so f*cking fat?"
Eddo Brandes: "Because every time I f*ck your mother, she throws me a biscuit..

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey Stumpy,

Hope you don't mind the new nick name, i thought this sledge went back to Dennis Lillie and a certain rolly polly Sri lankan captain. Could be wrong, but Im sure it was around long before G Mc.

Cheers
GJ

oigal said...

Mmm..makes me sound short...still been called worse..

You could be right..urban myth stuff I guess..still funny

Ah those were the days...

Ashes to Ashes
Dust to Dust
If Lillee don't get ya
then Mallett must..

Skipping school to watch Lillee bowl at the Adelaide Oval..

Anonymous said...

Ahhh Yes,
Lillee and Thompo at the Gabba, 1st test, 1st morning and West Indies 3 for 7, it was a school trip!!! Yes, the days of summer long ago.

GJ