Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Government Wankers

All the Stump has to say is we bloody well concur!

Dear Mr. Minister,
>
> I'm in the process of renewing my passport, and still cannot believe this.
>
> How is it that K-Mart has my address and telephone number, and knows that I bought a Television Set and Golf Clubs from them back in 1997, and yet, the Federal Government is still asking me where I was born and on what date.
>
> For Christ sakes, do you guys do this by hand?
>
> My birth date you have in my Medicare information, and it is on all the income tax forms I've filed for the past 40 years. It is on my driver's licence, on the last eight passports I've ever had, on all those stupid customs declaration forms I've had to fill out before being allowed off the planes over the last 30 years, and all those insufferable census forms that I've filled out every 5 years since 1966.
>
> Also..would somebody please take note, once and for all, that my mother's name is Audrey, my Father's name is Jack, and I'd be absolutely fucking astounded if that ever changed between now and when I drop dead!!!...
>
> SHIT!
>
> I apologize, Mr. Minister. But I'm really pissed off this morning. Between you an' me, I've had enough of all this bullshit! You send the application to my house, then you ask me for my fucking address!! What the hell is going on with your mob? Have you got a gang of mindless Neanderthal arseholes workin' there!
>
> And another thing, look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden? I can't even grow a beard for God's sakes. I just want to go to New Zealand and see my new granddaughter. (Yes, my son interbred with a Kiwi girl). And would someone please tell me, why would you give a shit whether I plan on visiting a farm in the next 15 days? If I ever got the urge to do something weird to a sheep or a horse, believe you me, I'd sure as hell not want to tell anyone!
>
> Well, I have to go now, 'cause I have to go to the other end of the city, and get another fucking copy of my birth certificate, and to part with another $80 for the privilege of accessing MY OWN INFORMATION!
>
> Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot, to assist in the issuance of a new passport on the same day?? Nooooo.. That'd be too fucking easy and makes far too much sense. You would much prefer to have us running all over the place like chickens with our fucking heads cut off, and then having to find some high society wanker to confirm that it's really me in the goddamn photo! You know the photo..the one where we're not allowed to smile?! ...you fucking morons
>
> Signed - An Irate Australian Citizen.
>
> P.S Remember what I said above about the picture, and getting someone in high-society to confirm that it's me? Well, my family has been in this country since before 1850! In 1856, one of my forefathers took up arms with Peter Lalor. (You do remember the Eureka Stockade!!) I have also served in both the CMF and regular Army something over 30 years (I went to Vietnam in 1967), and still have high security clearances.
> I'm also a personal friend of the president of the RSL.. And Lt General Peter Cosgrove sends me a Christmas card each year.
>
> However, your rules require that I have to get someone 'important' to verify who I am; You know.. Someone like my doctor; WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN FUCKING PAKISTAN!!!......a country where they either assassinate or hang their ex-Prime Ministers, and are suspended from the Commonwealth for not having the 'right sort of government.'
>
> You are all Fucking idiots

Sunday, July 27, 2008

CLIMATE CHANGE CLUNKERS

Still part of the Church of Climate Change Clunkers, you may wish to reconsider before you meekly hand over another $50 an airticket so QANTAS can promise to plant a tree in outer buggermedeadaztan..

Remember the super cyclones that were coming to destroy the east coast of Australia and wash dem meter maids into the great melt.

Ooops here's a quick graph of cyclone activity of the past 30 years or so...Is it the Stump or is the trend...



Speaking of BUGGER..If will be fun watching the explanations of the below sat pictures which show more Arctic Ice than this time last year (should we mention that they are having the coldest year on record up that way..or is that just teasing the disabled again)



The question remains when can we stop these ineffectual intellectual wanks and start putting some of this wasted money to where it can really make a difference to peoples lives and environment. Things like access to clean water, human rights (hard to give a damn about the blue whale, when the bloke next door wants to burn your house down because your GOD wears a different dress to yours or you are stupid enough to insist that your government is accountable to the people (rather than be elected on the strength of their moustache).

Saturday, July 26, 2008

CLIMATE CHANGE HOEEE

Some nefarious malcontent contends that the Stump deals in “Hoeee” in particular in regards to Climate Change. The answer is of course, ABSOLUTELY! The Stump is dedicated to self righteous, sanctimonious, unsubstantiated, self indulgent ranting, so in word

The Climate Change line between fact and fiction is so blurred and misleading means the Green Rabids almost qualify as religious deacons (with all the inherent toss that infers) and why shouldn't the stump join in (Will Smith, Tom Cruise please contact the Stump for details where to donate your gazillions and the Stump shall save your soul).

So in that fine tradition of Stump inspired, self righteous ranting, today’s cannon fodder is those fish in the barrel, more commonly known as the rabid greens and leftists of the world.

The Stump actually pities the rabid greenie, it must be tough to suddenly find after all that fighting, protesting, living in trees, having sex with strange smelling and hairy women and destroying other peoples hard earned property not to mention drinking your own urine that nuclear power may well provide perhaps the only viable salve to an over polluted planet.

A recent study to quantity various nations Environmental Performance Index, or EPI was jointly produced by Yale's Center for Law & Environmental Policy and Columbia's Center for International Earth Science. The study concluded that France is one of the least polluting countries on the planet, primarily because over 75% of its electricity needs are provided by Nuclear Power Plants. Interestingly, nearly all countries with a nuclear power industry scored well on the EPI (ok Russia didn’t, but sinking nuclear subs in the city harbours generally lowers the EPI score, although it makes the fish easier to catch).

What our dear anti nuclear greenies always fail to point out is, a large number of countries with nuclear power provide power to those bludger nations who semi-subsist on the myths of solar and wind energy. Personally the stump finds those nations on a par with those particular nasty people who refuse to have their children immunised. These losers are more than happy for others to take the (granted minimal) risk whilst basking in the protection and comfort that mass immunisation provides.

The Stump was stunned to learn of the obscene amount of subsidies, tax credits and mandatory buy backs that are required to support the “non polluting” options. Buy backs as a matter of interest is where the government mandates an artificially high and unsustainable price that ‘regular’ power utility companies must buy back the excess power on the irregular and odd occasion the wind blows more than usual.

Of course, it always escape the notice of the mungbeans that government subsidies actually means ripping more money out of the pockets out of those who actually work for living. Germany alone spent $6 billion dollars in artificial subsidies on mungbean power and still the European Union failed to meet any carbon emission targets. The Stump cannot help but think how much clean water $6 billion dollars could provide to the worlds poor.

The wholesale embrace of “Nuclear is evil, oil is evil – bio is good” green mantra (Ok you can throw in the odd death to America, kill the joows for a change every so often if you feel the need) has led to the major destruction of rain forests and ruination of millions of hectares of previously productive agricultural land. The resultant escalation of staple food prices and starvation in the worlds poorer regions has come about all in the name of a “greener planet”. Don't expect any sympathy from the Loony Greens however, they are past masters of self denial and unintended consequences.

To be fair, genetically a rabid leftist or greenie requires a very short memory to exist. To drift off topic for a moment, One has to wonder where the Leftists have gone in regard to Zimbabwe or should we say Rhodesia, the left’s support of Mugabe and his ilk was absolute and pathetic in the homage paid to this racist, murdering bastard). I have yet to see any of them tying themselves to public buildings in Zimbabwe "for the people".

Tired of listening to the high pitch whining and screaming from the self - righteous left and rabid greens, the more rational humans are left weary of the Anti US/West mantra regards to the environment with nary a word about the elephant/s in the room. Those elephants go by the name India, China and Indonesia, king polluters all. The significant difference being the pollution and destruction they bring about translates very little in lifting their people out of poverty and despair.

Koyoto was/is a classic example of new age wank supported and rewarded environmental vandals at the same time attempting to beggar the very nations who may actually end up providing the technological solutions to some of our environmental problems.

Like it or not, you do have to love the new religion of “CLIMATE CHANGE". High priest Gore remains the icon of choice and high priest of doom for our rabids, to which none may question. Despite the ever mounting evidence against his film (not documentary, most rational humans would agree that a documentary should be based on fact) of biblical disasters.

The best piece of CC devotee logic is when a devotee is presented with the fact that the world climate temperature has been falling since 2002, that fact is dismissed as a “blip’ and the disaster will continue as normal shortly and just proves the robustness of the model. Now if negative evidence to theory is to co opted to prove the model, what exactly does it take to make the devotees question God Gore and his minions. It does remind one of the back flips and twists all of our major religions have gone though as science exposed their myths and fantasies one by one. Never the less the gullible and weak minded still cling to their dreamtimes and Gods of small spaces, rationalising every discovery into their beliefs rather than face the world on its own terms.

Back to big AL, how many times can we show the same falling chuck of ice, drowning bear or waves washing up on that poor little villager? Problem is five years ago, as we were bombard with the poor villager show we were assured within five years the seas would have risen ½ meter (ok some said 2m but lets not tease the disabled) higher than now…OOPS..hasn’t happened..bugger! That poor villager has probably realised by now and long before the rabids, that it is not a good plan to keep animal cages in areas prone to King Tides.

The Stump also notes that the Rabids tend to brush over the fact that whilst the Artic ice may be retreating, the South Pole ice fields are increasing in depth and spread and have continued to do so over the last ten years (which will kinda bugger up, the rising seas calamity).

Oh the headaches of being a leftist green. Pity them for they need our help.

Oh a couple of other interesting things that fell out of the Yale-Columbia project. On a scale of one to hundred on forest protection, Brazil who has traditionally been blamed as the villain in forest destruction scored 86. Indonesia achieved yet another infamous first and managed a well deserved “0”.

Disclaimer - The above should in no way be read as support for the proposed Indonesian Nuclear Power Plant piece of insanity. A government needs to be able to at least drill a hole in the ground, stops its capital city from flooding every year and killing its citizens or fly a national airline safely before moving onto reasonably technical things like Nuclear Power

Saturday, July 05, 2008

TERMINAL DECISIONS

It seems GJ has started a bit of a blue with his dismissal
of an errant driver. A relatively common theme being thrown around revolves around some quaint cafe socialist view of the world and the exploitation of an underclass. Which is amusing as often the comments often expose a degree of snobbery by the sanctimonious "Ches" leaving the comments.

No one is denying that some bosses are arseholes and the whole workers obligations and rights thing is a complete buggers muddle in Indonesia (notice we did include obligations, it’s a two way street). However, to assume that working as domestic help is a job choice to be pitied shows a complete misunderstanding of what real life is like for many people in this country (personally the Stump finds the profession of accountants and money men far more pitiful, after all they only parasite from the real work that others have achieved).

There is not enough work for everyone in Indonesia, nor realistically will there be in any foreseeable future. If by employing a maid/driver/gardener some of the wealth is kept locally and just perhaps that money allows the next generation to achieve even a modicum of higher chooling then that has to be a good thing.

Stump stands to be corrected, but is willing to suggest that most Australian Expatriates (this will bring in the crows) influenced by the fairly class less culture tend to treat their employees on fairly informal basis and if would be rare for an employee to be exploited as such.

The Stump regularly gets the sh*ts with the self righteous arseholes who wander through the airport for instance, proclaiming loudly “I don’t need anyone to carry my bag, I am not going to exploit the poor bastards”. Bloody drongos, what does he think the “poor bastard” is going to do if he doesn’t make any money as a porter .. Pop down to the nearest unemployment office and collect a cheque.

Having said that, the Stump like GJ is astounded that some people once locked into a secure and (relatively) well paying job, will then jeopardise the whole thing out of sheer stupidity. Company Stump recently sent a very young, very bright Indonesian (lets call him Bright Spark or BS for short) to Australia for a series of courses. It was made very clear to BS that a new product line was coming into the country and he was to be the guru of all things in that product line and the potential was there for him to reach very senior management. Sure enough, the “live for today” mental trap kicked in and he was caught selling spares of company equipment to a rival company for the sake of a couple of Rp. Shocked and horrified when he was terminated and police were called (ah the police investigation, that’s another story) he lost the job and will never be employed by another expatriate company in the region for wait for it…5 million Rp.

Now the self appointed advocates out there, will say for only 5 million. Give him another chance. Screw that! Company paid for his families hospital stays when they were sick, paid a good wage, paid thousands for international courses and gave him a future that less than 20% of Indonesians will ever see. Basic Trust and honesty was all that was required in return a fair contract and he broke it.

Although to be fair consequences and action –reaction often don’t seem to a consideration to large proportion of the population. Witness the acts of your local motorcycle riders “I ride like lunatic, on the wrong side of the road and don’t look left or right then…SPLAT.” is not a thought pattern that comes naturally.

Another example:

Several years ago, I was staying in a home stay in Kupang, nice Christian family (little weird, like all god botherers but nice). One day the two teenagers in the house come to my room

Them “Hey you wanna come and see where (we) burnt the Muslims houses last night”?

Stump “Eeer Ok”

Yep sure enough a dozen plus houses burnt to the ground and on the way back home

Stump… “Why did they (you) burnt their houses”

Them ….. ‘Because they burnt our church”

Stump… “Mmm Ok”

But it gets better.. ten minutes later we pass a remarkably unburnt church

Stump… “Huh// I thought you said they burnt your church”

Them… Sheepishly “Someone said they did”

But wait gets even better…

About a week later, everyone is sitting around the table and the conversation starts with everyone complaining that the price of fish has tripled and is now a luxury item

Stump… “Hang on..Weren’t those houses that were burnt the homes of the fishermen (as well as being Muslims, it was a fisher village)”

Them.. “Yes why do you ask” ..puzzled looks what’s this bule on about..

Stump “Well if you burn the fisherman's houses then it stands to reason….ah forget it” wandering off down the pub for a fishless dinner..

Consequences …………………… They are a bastard with a life of their own.

Wednesday, July 02, 2008

HUMAN POPCORN

Have not been sleeping well at the Stump. Perhaps like Will (The richer I get, the nuttier I am) Smith, we are searching for the answers to life’s trick questions:

Is Will Smith a Scientologist and why should we care?

Why is the opinion of two minute human popcorn actors so valued?

Where are the Loony Leftists and peaceniks traveling to Zimbabwe and tying themselves to polling booths to ensure freedom and the rights of Zimbabweans.

Why do the loons only act like leftist moronic peanuts when the US is involved?

Speaking of hypocrites, how many Muslims died in the Sudan this week and what was net reaction of the Muslim world?

Is it because they are Black Muslims that nobody gives a rats?

Who actually believes the demonstrations in Jakarta and the recent harassment of minorities/ethnic groups in Indonesia is not part of a wider political agenda?

Who in Indonesia does not know the puppet master and why do Indonesians fall for this game time and again?

Who else thinks it’s morally and intellectually repugnant to have a stinking rich bastard on a Climate Change Committee when thousands of people are being forced from their homes due to his mad (man) made ecological disaster?

Oh well back to sleep……zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz