Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Professors and Liars

In this day and age of global and instant media coverage, the trouble with making really bizarre statements is it is only a matter of time before someone, somewhere calls your bluff!

Senior Brother Grimm commenting on the Lapindo Mud Disaster that left thousands upon thousands homeless and has caused untold enviromental damage, recently stated "According to the experts, it is truly a natural disaster nothing can prevent," This was in front of a room of foreign correspondents in Jakarta last week. He went on to say "It happens in a lot of places of the world". Yea Right!! These statements were made to the sound effects of journalists and others laughing uncontrollably and falling off chairs.

Then wouldn't you know it on Page 3 of Jakarta Post today, the findings of a scientific team lead by Professor Richard Davies (University of Durhams Centre for Research into Earth Energy Systems). The good Professor not only disputes the Brother's Grim Version, but actually rules them out even as just silly. The article which was printed in the peer review journal "GSA Today".

Thats two completely different stories going around. The trick for most us in Indonesia is to work out who is the liar. Do we believe Professor Davies and his team or the ass clutching version of the brothers Grim.

Even in the worst of circumstances, there is always a smile (grimace) to be had if you look hard enough. The lastest competition in Indonesia is which is the poorly position named cabinet position in Indonesia..Is it "Coordinating Minister for People's Welfare" (What a great title) or Transport ("we know the planes are safe") Minister or the annual favorite the Minister the Environment (also know as Minister for Plam Oil) .

I'll say one thing for them all, they all have balls as big as elephants! How the F*** these Grims and friends even look at themselves in the mirror every day astounds me.

Also on the rumour mill.... Over 5000 villagers in Puncak Papau have been forced to flee their homes due to violence and threats of violence. No confirmation as yet and I don't think we will see anything in Indonesian Papers. Does anyone have any good links on the latest "hearts and minds" in the provinces.

Sunday, January 21, 2007

Tough Tape and Tough Men

Ok, a couple of direct pinches today, after all piracy is not a crime but a vocation in Indonesia.
Out of respect for the Indonesian Airline Industry and the Transport Minister we bring you these:

To find out which airline you will have to go here.

On another topic, although still related to unsavory human beings and a lack of regard for others. I am constantly surprised by the tolerance that Indonesians show to people (and I use the term loosely!) that continue to bring the majority religion and the nation into disrepute.

"Islamic (????) Protesters at the indecency (????) trial of editor Playboy's Indonesia editor, Erwin Arnada hurled abuse at Playboy magazine's first Indonesian centerfold Thursday, calling her a prostitute and saying they hoped her daughter would be raped." As the incident was widely reported in the International Herald Tribune, its safe to say Indonesia's reputation as taken yet another knock on the world stage, thanks to the bottom feeders.

"Hope your daughter gets raped!!!" besides the fact that playboy international, let alone the soaped, washed out Indonesia version is pretty lame. To say I hope you daughter gets raped, is by any standards in any civilisation a repugnant comment!! It is a sad reflection on society that people like this still seem to be able to walk the street without being condemned as the complete Dickheads and two-bit bullies they are.

One of the protestors was pictured in last Friday’s Jakarta Post (and we ain’t talking the top of the gene pool here), was pictured trying to destroy a copy of the Indonesian Playboy. Sadly (for him) he was reduced to tearing it up page by page (which is pathetic, we ain't talking a phone book here). Even more ironic was a man (?) like him was tearing up pictures of a beautiful girl in a bikini. Lets be honest, it’s the closest a sorry little thug like that is every going to get to a girl not under duress.

If you cannot get last Friday's Jakarta Post, Indcoup has remarkable likeness of the thug here

There are millions upon millions of great people in Indonesia, but as they say.."just one goat"

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Lords of the RINGS

"Each man must for himself alone decide what is right and what is wrong. You cannot shirk this and be a man." Mark Twain

From time to time, Indonesian bloggers particularly expatriate bloggers face the accusation they are too critical of Indonesia and its ways (for want of a better term). In many cases, quite rightly and I do include myself.

In my defence, its the old story when you do good no one bad and the world world knows about it.

So in that vein and with the bottom feeders already at the trough positioning for the next election, I thought I would so a post appealing for help to identify those in power, who actually are working for the people. You know the good guys, the honest ones, the ethical ones.

The Jakarta Post gives a great example today, there must have been at least one person who said NO THANKS!

I won't link to the post, the links disappear anyway, but story goes like this..

Three members of the Bekasi Legislative Council from the 1999-2004 period returned Friday gold signet rings that were bestowed upon them as gifts at the end of their terms in office.

The rings, worth Rp 66.6 million each (about $7000USD EACH), were given to 45 councilors. But the Supreme Audit Agency found they were improperly purchased, using budgetary funds.

Ok we can discount the three members who gave the rings back as good guys. Its safe to assume they only did it after The 2004 Presidential Decree on guidelines for regional budget spending which states that money for gifts, souvenirs or bouquets cannot be taken from the budget was issued.

(Getting nervous lads..if it was an attack of ethics, it took a long time coming).

So my question is surely there was one man/woman who didn't need a Presidential Decree to tell right from wrong?

Surely there is one man/woman who looking around the conditions that Bapak and Average have to endure thought "gee a $7000 gift from the council budget, in country with 10 million unemployed (officially, unofficially I reckon you could times that by 5 and still be under)is not really the thing to do?

Surely, there is one man/woman who looked at the schools in the said area and just vomited at the thought of taking the ring?

Who is he/she?

We need a hero!!

Perhaps we could start a bloggers dream team??? (if we can find enough respectable contenders, gotta admit cupboard looks bare).

Monday, January 08, 2007


It was a great break on the Island of the Gods (Bali). Sun, Sand and some outstanding games of Golf. There is a lot to be said for Girl Caddies and an Ocean view Golf Course. Don't forget your KITAS as it makes the difference between a $100 and $200 game of Golf, expensive but wow!!!! By the way, the little white hut you can see in the distance that's the tee off for the green in the foreground...Ain't far but teeing off across the ocean eats balls.

Unfortunately, we made the error of booking via Lion (Lying) Air, one of the low cost, lower standard carriers (as Gardua was booked solid) that plague this country.. This resulted in both journeys to and from Bali being a trial that tested the most adventurous amongst us. Minimum Delay seven hours and (I guess this is good) only two bags misplaced.

Setting new standards in Customer Service, our cheerful Lying representative informed us that if our bag was found then he would call us and we could come down and pick it up. Gee..After a seven hour delay and lost bag that was probably not the thing to say. We certainly gained the attention of the security guards as it was explained if I had to come and collect the bag, then it would be from an orifice not normally used for storing lost property.

We at the stump have decided its just too much to expect for an Indonesian Airline to display any degree of competence or professionalism. Changes are afoot and we are busy planning our next break to sunny Thailand for a week of Golf and Diving (ok…so the breaks a long way off, we can day dream). It’s a shame Bali is so ham strung by such dangerous morons and I don't just mean the airlines.

At the time of writing, the ADAM Air plane is still not found, survivors are still being picked up from yet another ferry sinking, tens of thousands of people are still being displaced by toxic mud from the Lapindo Disaster and the responsible ministers still have jobs. Situation normal..

I will be a bit busy catching up on work for awhile, so I will post when I can.

P.S. I have found a new Troll; his name is “ASS”. He isn’t very smart and repeats himself a lot but is kind of funny. I promise I shall feed this one more often.