Doncha just love censorship by the righteous

Those incredibly brave and passionate men of the Islamic Defenders Front have turned art critics saving our souls from looking at naked women. A recent art exhibition was forced to withdraw a painting of Adam and Eve because they were naked and it was therefore pornography (Just were did they buy clothes from anyway, let alone the hijab).

This of course will prove a real issue for those of course who also love the old masters, because in our ignorance we were all just a bunch of old pervs, at least the Islamic Defenders Front arrived in time to save us from ourselves. It should be fun as we toss all those old oil painting in the fire.

Another huge step forward for human knowledge, freedom and expression.

Of course, if our highly respected lovers of democracy and people's rights really want to be brave perhaps they should trying pulling down dear old naked Chloe( http://www.melbourne.com.au/images/chloe.jpg ) at Y&J's pub, that would really test their mettle instead wanking around with a frightened population and government/police force that does not give a toss except where the next buck can be scammed from.

Hi All,

Sorry been a little while since we posted but been traveling up the the Highlands (See Picture). Actually saw SNOW in the topics...Well we were up pretty high.

Back in the big smoke once more (and in Jakarta that literally means big smoke), some say its the third most polluted city in the world although that may just be people being kind.

Nothing has changed since we have been away. The Cianjur Regent has banned the Muslim Sect "Ahmadiyah" from worshipping in his province, The Islamic Defenders Front is threatening to destroy night clubs and places of entertainment that open during the upcoming holy month and there is an uproar because a girl was photographed kissing her soldier boyfriend as he left Aceh.

Meanwhile, action over the malnourished children across the country, bird flu, outbreaks of polio, women and babies begging in the street will have to wait I guess. First things first!! Lets get those young people displaying acts of affection.

In truth, ACEH applies a version of Sharia law, which allows stoning and whipping along with other gruesome methods of punishment. In last few months people have been publicly flogged for gambling (only small fry, interestingly enough). Some people (? I use the term loosely) are calling for the "kissing" girl to have a similar punishment.

I think if that happens I have had enough of this, I earn my living here now and love the country but could no longer remain and live in the same country as these evil, horrible, small minded little people who seem to gaining more and more power every day.

Sorry all been away in the jungle for awhile more tomorrow

Mandala Airlines Crash


Another sad day for Indonesians yesterday with a plane crash killing 143 (?) people.
In the mist of all this sadness a grief comes one those truely remarkable statements from the Indonesian Transport Minister Hatta "There was nothing wrong with the plane, it was certified". Well that must be relief to all the relatives and it certainly takes the hassle out of conducting an investigation and searching for those pesky black boxes.

Mandala was set up in 1969 and is one of several low-cost airlines that fly across the vast Indonesian archipelago. It is 90 per cent owned by a foundation set up by the army strategic reserve Kostrad.

RELIGIOUS TOLERANCE IN INDONESIA
That fountain of bravery, well spring of truth, handful of hope...Ok Just kidding. The local English Rag " the Jakarta Post" is a must read for anyone traveling through SE Asia. Never a day goes by without us choking and wiping away tears of .......

today's (29 Aug 05) gem, page two "Govt won't prosecute Muslim hard liners over church closures" Minister for Religious Affairs M.Maftuh Basyuni said "We will do nothing. We will only clarify there were no church closures" he went onto say the groups closed down illegal congregations (sic) set up in residential areas because they had " created anxiety among the local residents"

Wow, as visitors to this country there seems so much wrong here its hard to know where to start.

As we continue down the streets of Jakarta, watching other groups of thugs extort money from the "pedicab drivers" and "bemo" drivers the following questions spring to mind:

1. What due process was followed before these so called "illegal congregations" were shut down?
2. Who appointed the Anti Apostasy Movement Alliance legal law enforcers and who is responsible for their actions?
3. What "local residents" complained and to which government department?
4. If the Indonesian Constitution guarantees religious freedom then is the forcible prevention of people performing their religious obligations treason?
5. What is the role of the police in this country?

Of course then there is our driver Wayan, a Hindu living and working in Jakarta. We asked him if the "Call to prayer" played over loud speakers five times a day every day for the Muslim faithful made him feel anxious? He answered "of course, its a lot worse now than in the past, lots of orang gila now" Would he complain and ask to have the Mosques crediting checked? Wayan answered "Kamu Gila (You Crazy)!"

With due apologies to Iron Maiden but why on Earth did you use a QANTAS Training Manual Cover for your ablum

QANTAS SUCKS

We have uprooted the stump again and have replanted in Jakarta, Indonesia for a while, so its down to the market to do some shopping (see the picture). Three questions:

1. What is horrid pimply thing that smells so bad (not davo)?

2. Why does everyone assume we need a girl?

3. Where is the blue sky and sun?

Seriously, just arrived via the Jakarta International (?) Airport flying the mangy roo (QANTAS). If there is an award for the most arrogant airline staff in the world, QANTAS have it in the bag.

Lady requesting assistance to place her bag in the overhead locker; QANTAS Hostie (yes you are bloody hosties skip the PC crap) in a snide remark to her mate " if its that heavy she should have checked it as luggage.

No my little darling you should have "checked your attitude" before you came to work.

The "Stump" agrees its time to sell the shares in the mangy roo, its only a matter of time before the political bias for QANTAS drys up (particularly now Minister for QANTAS freebies Anderson has gone) and Singapore Airlines moves into Australia.

Once SQ moves in, the days of the roo feasting in the long paddock are over. I guess QANTAS beer bitches and beastie boys will have to find work in french restaurants around the world, so they can still be rude to people and get paid for it.

While we are on the subject, the lads at the stump have discussed and awarded the following green tinnie awards (out of 12 because that how the tinnies come)

Singapore Airlines = 9/12 Kinda Sterile but Great Service, Great planes with all the extras. Special Note: How do the girls get into those uniforms? No bull and crap PC here!The girls look great and do a great job.

Malaysian Airlines = 8/12 A poor mans Singapore but still great service.

Garuda Airlines = 6/10 Well ok, they are never on time, your seat is cancelled if somebody more important (?) comes along, they run out of the most inept airports in South East Asia but hey the staff smile (even when they tell you your luggage has been used as whell chock. However at the end of the day they put the adventure back into flying

Merparti Airlines = 5/10 As for Guruda but with worse planes and less money don't be surprised if the plane is delayed to wait for more passengers to pay for the fuel.

SAS = 7/10 Smooth, professional and friendly something like a swiss clock I guess but they do seem to care.

QANTAS = 2/10 Arrogant, but come fully equiped with hags and pillow biters but coz we are Australians we will give them a point for the Kangaroo on the side. Oops we had to take the point back off, Davo just reminded us of that ghastly, vomitous Aborginal (Koori?)Art thingy that covers a whole plane. Did we lose a bet or something to have to fly that around the world?

Virgin = 6/10 Stingy, but lots fun to fly. Rumour has it all the pretty young things with a sense of humour are being replaced with the boilers again..sigh

Air North (NT) = 6/10 Expensive (make that gougers, Ned Kelly would blush working for these guys), saving grace the hosties are funny "Sit down!!!! In the history of this airline no one has even beaten a plane back to the terminal" or "If we should crash blow on the little whistle so the crocodiles know where to find you"

Thai = 7/10 Ok maybe more how thehell would we know we were looking at other things.

Emirates = 9/10 Actually no one has ever flown with them but they must great because the rumours say they are (you try and find someone who actually has?????)

Its that time of year again, where Indonesia sets fire to the rain forest (ok whats left of it)

Between the illegal mining, illegal timber cutting and rampant burning its a tough life being a jungle creature in Indonesia. One has to wonder how much longer the rest of the ASEAN community is going to tolerate its crazy, crooked, anti social dirty ol uncle who keeps spitting and urinating in the house.

Fair dinkum, if Indonesia was your neighbour in the suburbs, you would have to move. Not that you would get any resale on your house.

Hi There,

We are all back at the stump, licking our wounds and drying our tears (oops that aint true real men don't cry...maybe a little but only when we get the brylcream in our eyes)

As usual Jakarta was the bizarre mix of overt wealth and and abject poverty.. Took our vistors from the great south land for a night life tour .... BATS bar (named for location and patrons)
CJ's (how many people can you fit into one bar really) and of course BLOK M www.jakartablokm.com . General opinion from the stump ..BATS ..ok CJs...ok BLOK M ..just to damn sleazy. Couple of bars worth a mention Sportsman Bar not bad, nice food clean and not too many ladies...girls of the night. My Bar..not for most including us.

Gobsmack of the trip..." 10 year old kid kept trailing us for money until well past 1 am, "go home to your mother kid" Answer " mama di sana"( mum over there) pointing to a lady lying rags sleeping on a board on the footpath...

Ok so now how do we feel...

We are relocating the stump to Jakarta for a week or so...see you when we get back..

NAUGHTY LITTLE LIBERAL THOUGHTS

MUI TO FORMULATE EDICTS AGAINST ‘LIBERAL THOUGHTS’
The Indonesian Ulema Council (MUI) will formulate several edicts to put an end to what it terms "deviant secular and liberal Islamic thoughts" during its four-day national congress that opened here on Tuesday (26 July). According to the council's edict committee, the edicts will represent the MUI's determination to win the "war of ideas against liberal Islam".

Word from the stump is..... Its about time!!!! Those pesky little liberal thoughts are just proving to be to much of a problem. Next thing you know people will want to have the freedom to believe in what they want. Thats the trouble with ideas one gets out then there's a whole bunch of 'em like bloody rabbits at the stump they are!!

EAST TIMOR

http://www.theaustralian.news.com.au/common/story_page/0,5744,16049802^601,00.html Well it has been a a couple of years since I was last in East Timor. I arrived shortly after the Australian soldiers following the rampage by the pro and anti independence militias (oh yea for those of you from the left side of politics both sides managed to disgrace mankind as a species) .

I watched with pride as the Australian contingent conduct itself with dignity and professionalism and later with dismay over the next two years after the UN arrived with their bloated bureaucracy, incompetence and corruption driven practices undid all the progress made.

It was particularly sad, as I like a number of Australians believed in the lofty ideals of the UN only to find in practice the UN is little more than a third world employment agency (with some notable exceptions) that would not be qualified to run the proverbial "chook raffle" (although the UN would employ 1500 people on USD daily allowances and the chook would go missing)

Of course, United Nations did a great ? job even before the independence encouraging all and sundry to vote in the referendum. Of course, once the violence started (something that even blind freddy could have seen coming a mile away) in a moment of shining glory, the UN packed its bags and ran leaving the locals to fend for themselves. That said, it should be noted that some heroic and noble UN staffers stayed at considerable risk to themsleves to help and protect where they could however the UN as an organisation disgraced its charter again.

Anyone who had any dealings with the UN after they came crawling back, once Australia had cleaned up their mess and the locals had paid the price in blood, had no doubt that the future of East TImor was grim. Corruption and incompetence was taught as part of UN state building 101. Make no mistake, East Timor will remain dependent on Australia much like PNG for as far forward as you can see. Oil & Gas money will ensure a few corrupt dogs get rich but for the average Timorese live is tough and going to get tougher (but far be it for Australia to attach strings to its Aid like governance and sound practice that would be racist) .

Some classics (where were the UN advisors and what the hell were they thinking):

1. East Timor adopts the USD as official currency - smart when over 85% population earn less than $1 a day, kinda tough to make change.

2. East Timor adopts Portuguese as the national language - wee! now we can trade with Portugal, eer maybe some African and South American countries... (minor technical hitch nobody under 45 speaks it..oh well).

3. Tampons are now GST free (oh look found a UN advisor, you would think he or she had something better to do than swipe at Howard's GST particulary seeing how the only women who can afford tampons are UN staffers and expats).

Pre Dawn Anzac Service - Borneo Indonesia

Welcome to the GreenStump blog.

If you were thinking this blog is about greenery, gardening or perhaps the environment...sorry you are wrong. Its green stump because black stump was taken (so now's the time for the greenies, tree huggers, rose growers to wander off in search of more fertile pastures, so to speak).
There will be the rants, raves, reflections of a 40 something Australian, who is currently working in South East Asia after mucking up his marriage some time ago and decided that maybe a new start would help...that and the fact that money may not buy you happiness it sure decides what class of misery you live in.

You can perhaps expect some funny stories, sad stories, some politics (strong views but doesn't matter because no one listens..grin). Anyway if you read this have fun or not up to you..