Tuesday, April 15, 2008

CHASTITY BELTS & AIRPORTS

Why is it every time I enter Kuala Lumpur Airport I feel like I am an intruder in a huge empty warehouse? Certainly, an efficient and clean edifice but just seems cold an soul-less temple to the doomed. That being said, it does make an interesting comparison with the filthy, broken down nest of petty hustlers that is the Indonesian International Airport.

We had the good fortune to catch the Singapore Airlines A380 to Sydney, flying “cattle class” still got to walk past what must be the biggest business class seats in existence. The stump is seriously impressed!! Recently read on GJ’s blog that when he flew the big bird, the in-flight video kept re-booting, unfortunately this is still the case…Most unlike Singapore Airlines!! Come on guys, you have reputation to maintain.

Coming home was not as much fun, flight times meant I was “Milk Run” bound (doomed). Malaysian Airlines, SYDNEY-BRISBANE-KL-JAK-….. All in all, fairly average flights, staff were great (QANTAS could take a few hints) but the planes were old and tired and it’s a fair mongrel of a trip. To add insult to injury, the sound was faulty on the in flight video and some mongrel knocked off my reading glasses. Still enough bagging the airlines, time to move on to an easier target.

QANTAS baggage handlers (and Malaysia Airlines has already implemented) a 20kg limit per bag, per customer as the poor, precious little things cannot lift anything about 20KG. Awww diddums girls! Are you are kidding 20Kg?? Fair dinkum, it's time for a name change, perhaps QANTAS tissue chuckers would be more descriptive. Perhaps the QANTAS tissue chuckers should see what the average 70kg wringing wet, Indonesian Baggage handler has to deal with, you guys are SOFT!

UPDATE….. Aaaagh, told you Malaysian Airlines are old and tired!! Just been informed there is to be an eight hour delay because our connecting Malaysian Airlines flight is broken. Still they gave out a free hamburger voucher (too bad about the other connecting flights, we have missed tho I guess…BUGGER).

UPDATE 2…Just read that some government (?) Drongo has recommended that the massage girls in his province of Indonesia must wear chastity belts to prevent illicit sex. Seriously, you can’t make this sh#t up. Comic Classics!!

Update 3.. Meanwhile in the second adition of the weekly Indonesian "why don't they take us seriously" awards, apparently “You Tube” has been blocked from a number of Indonesian ISP’s. which is fair enough can’t have the masses getting a different opinion now can we..To the supporters of the censorship laws….you were saying?

5 comments:

GJ said...

Hey need an accountant death toll!!

It's amazing the crap you miss on a trip to the real world as opposed to the unreal world.

Welcome back

GJ

oigal said...

Hi GJ, Thanks, yep the battle of unworthy vs the absurb is post on its own..but as you know first the going through the gazzillion emails of bad news that our staff don't answer..(most of the staff here don't do bad news emails or phone calls.cultural thing?)

anyway mate, I am off to buy a master key.

rimafauzi said...

apparently the chastity belt is another one of the government's brilliant idea to decrease promiscuity among masseuses in Indo. I personally think that the government is silly not to have their mouths padlocked as well, and amputate the arms too! Because we all know that women are the the root of all things evil and immoral..

GJ said...

I'm told you can defeat an Indonesian padlock with nothing more than a good hard stare!!!
So don't waste your money

Rob Baiton said...

Yes, something good and hard! But I did not think it was a stare :)