Australia Attacks

Well I wasn't going to post today but then today's headline in the Jakarta Post caught my eye "Experts Warn of Aussie Arms Spending". Wow this must be serious I thought. If a country of 25 million people (if you count those thinking about having a baby) is suddenly a threat to country like Indonesia of 235 million (give or take 25 Million). Interesting red herring...Australia's entire Australia's entire population is the error magin in Indonesia's population count.

Anyway what have those pesky, aggressive Aussies gone and done now? According to International Relations Expert (?) at the University of Indonesia, Hariyadi Wirawan, Australia going to spend A$11 billion purchasing an advanced fleet of destroyers and amphibious warships with aim of encirling China with the help of Japan and the United States.

Well all I can say the Chinese must be terrified, at the sheer size of the fleet. What does the huge fleet that has all of the region trembling consist of?

Drum Roll please...............Three destroyers and two amphibious ships. I certainly hope that Hariyadi mentioned to the US that Australia might need some help encirling China alone. Based on google figures each Australia ship in the new fleet will have to encircle 264370377.6 people each.

Hayiyardi went on to say, that regional transparency was the key to avioding insecurity and urged Australia its current move.

Well Hayiyardi, its obvious! Australia's being very sneaky, John Howard held press conference and told everyone, the type of ship, who makes them (Spain), what they can carry, what armaments, how much they cost and where they would be based. But its all part of cunning plan. The Stump has it on good authority before Australia encircles China with its five ships, its going to practice with Indonesia, lets face it thats a lot easier only 47 million people per ship. (Ok we confess, our source is a mildly pissed off shark who lost half a fin to satisfy some sicko's desire for shark fin soup, which tends to cast some doubt on everything he tells us)

Meanwhile Bantarto Bandoro from Indonesia's Centre for Strategic and International Studies said Australia's military build-up could be the beginning of a regional arms race (hey Ban Ban. get a grip!! Its five ships!)

Of course, a more logical, less smoke induced rational might just be that Australia is an island with over 60,000km of coastline to protect or if you will 12000km for each ship of the fleet.

Only question left to ask, where do you buy the wacky weed?

Poilce brutality

Speaking of serial ...Boof heads

Ah Mates..where would you be without them!

Global Warming hits the stump

Bugger it!!

Just when I was throwing out all my winter woolies (which I had collected for the great coming Ice Age that we were assured was coming in seventies) and swapping them all for board-shorts and suntan lotion, THE BLOODY DROUGHT broke in Australia.

As of 22/6/07 Sydney’s water catchment dams were at 50% up from 39% a week before. I have always thought it was a bit bizarre not to expect droughts on the driest continent in the world but hey who I am to question the great global warming gods (previously know as the Y2K gods, the nuclear winter gods, the…never mind you get the picture).

Far be it for anyone to suggest that just perhaps Australia suffered a water shortage due to huge population increase over the past 20 years coupled with outbreak of loony greens who opposed each and every effort to build additional water catchment areas (along with everything else).

Meanwhile, other parts of Australia have experienced the coldest day in 30 years which is a bloody funny way to run a global warming program. Maybe Australia wasn’t invited?

I know that a couple of instances don’t break a model, but if the GGW acolytes can cherry pick facts, so can I. A few more of these and Al’s bell curve will invert and disappear up its own orifice dragging Al and the acolytes with it.. (Just where did the Y2K ghoulies go).

Meanwhile this is worth a visit just for fun but do bring a jumper.

EMERGENCY LANES

Had to make an urgent flight into Jakarta last week to accompany someone very close to me for a medical emergency.

I hereby state that those arrogant, inconsiderate arseholes who block the emergency lane are the scum of the earth.

To the guy we swiped after he repeatedly refused to clear passage..SCREW YOU TOO!! We chucked a business card at ya, do call.. I am dying to explain to you in person, in close up, extermely personal, graphic manner why you are an arsehole!

I would have loved to stop at the time but frankly we had a human being (different species to yourself) to care for and who was more important to us than some arrogant Pr**k in his new shiny car..

That being said, the medical aid we received (once we got there) was outstanding! Don't believe all you hear about the medical facilities in Indonesia (as long as you can afford to pay!!)

I now have a new hobby, whenever in Jakarta, hire the oldest wreck you can and wait for the arseholes to rip past in the emergency lane...Its just a matter of mving left a few inches.. and the fun begins

GO TO HELL AUSTRALIA

It didn't take long..Sigh..The "Rent a Thug" crowd are protesting along with the usual threats of mayhem outside the Australian Embassy in Jakarta. In a fine display of a civilisation at its zenith "hundreds of protesters mainly from youth groups, rallied outside the embassy in Jakarta. The protesters chanted: "Get out, get out, Australia"; "Burn it down, burn it down"; and "Go to hell, Australia."
Like a lot of Australians, sometimes I think its not a bad idea (the get out bit anyway, hardly seems any point some days)..

The thugs are predictable and dangerous (and very buffed for someone just off the streets), I wonder if there is any statesmen around to notice the link between reactions like the above and the headline on the same page, RI on the outs with tourists

Ben over at Indonesia Anon
(see comments) took me to task somewhat and said the action was counter-productive and in essence not real smart.

Not sure what Indonesia A really expected Australia to do..Unlike a lot of places, in Oz raising a summons against anyone is a fairly simple process and government intervention would be political suicide. Secondly, A Summons is NOT an arrest warrant but a direction to attend formal proceedings (although failure to obey a summons can lead to an arrest warrant in certain circumstances).

A statesman of any standing would have understood the domestic political and legal situation in the country he/she was visiting and acted accordingly.
i.e.
1. Pass the summons to his lawyers and get on with what he was trying to achieve or;

2. If the case is as dead, buried and complete (black pun intended..do Google search Balibo Five "completed") as Indonesia insists then comply with the summons and answer the questions in the spirit of inter-country relations o

3. The last option (which does not apply to statesmen) is rush off home in a hissy fit, watch the "rent a thugs" protest your "impolite" treatment despite the dangers they pose to life and limb.

Of course, Option three merely confirms the contempt for due process and well being of others and..........

Meanwhile Sooty, the person at the centre of the current storm and Jakarta Mayor is still fuming. Sooty prefers the title Governor, but the reality is he's a Mayor in charge of the three Rs rates, roads and rubbish. None which are great points of achievement after a gazillion years in office).

Sooty has now stated that unless Australia apologised he would cease cooperation with Australia (big call for a council Mayor). Now that's counter-productive, what Sooty fails to realise is the moment he said that, a number of Australian Tax Payer's breathed a sigh of relief.

The vast majority of Australian's view Indonesia with a high degree of suspicion as do Indonesians Australia. It should be the aim of statesmen to understand the two cultures and build the relationships, not endanger all with childish hissy fits. But such creatures are few and far between.

Now a conspiracy theorist would wonder, how the hell did John Howard get Sooty to go along with his plan, to ramp up "the evil Indonesians are just waiting to get us" election ploy. John Howard has made a career out of raising the unease and security factor just prior to elections (In full knowledge the ALP, is renown as a bunch of security wimps). I would not be surprised if little John doesn't flash Sooty a get well card.

Anyway Sooty, thanks from the stump for drawing attention to the unresolved issues of 35 years ago..funny how bad rots ya bones and the smell never goes away..

Oh the report widespread in Indonesia that the summons was delivered by police using a duplicate key to get into his room..is plainly nonsense. Summons serving is such a routine procedure even the newest rookie understands the procedure. Mind you it would have been far more interesting to serve it during an official function, much more dramatic and newsworthy.

As for the picture.....There are brave men and then there is the Mob! One of the deceased (completed?)Balibo Five..

Here Sooty Sooty ..

Like all of us I am very proud of my nation of birth but sometimes she really gives you reason to be really really proud:

Jakarta Governor Sutiyoso cut short his trip Tuesday after "discourteous" Australian officials served him with a summons.

In what the Indonesian side is likening to "illegal entry", officials from the New South Wales coroner's office reportedly barged into the governor's room at the Shangri-La Hotel in Sydney without permission, thrusting a summons toward Sutiyoso to testify at an inquiry into the 1975 deaths of Australian journalists in East Timor.

"They entered the room using a duplicate key accompanied by a hotel employee," Foreign Ministry spokesman Kristiarto Soeryo Legowo told The Jakarta Post on Tuesday night about the incident, which occurred at around 4:15 p.m. local time.

Check out the front page of the today's Jakarta Post and/or here for full details..Absolutely beautiful.

Must be hard for someone like Sutiyoso to accept that outside of his own little worl of grovellers and arse lickers he is nobody special just another dodgy suspect!

Now of course, Sutiyoso obeyed the laws of the land he was in and answered the summons (after all isn't that what the treaty with Singapore is all about). Actually, no he didn't..He ran all the way home, bleating and whinging about naughty, disrespectful ozzies...Tsk BLOODY tsk. Don't hurry back, you won't be missed! Still its nice to know if I am ever summoned to court in Indonesia, the correct course of action is to run.

Lastest information is Poor little sooty is demanding an apology, well on behalf of us all...Sooty..you have two chances........ Buckleys and Nunn. (I was going to use a picture with a nice polite hand gesture but nagh way too subtle).

The inquest is to do with the MURDER of five journalists in East Timor. There are thousands of pages on the actual murder both in print and on the web. I encourage you to view them all. Type Balibo Five in Google search and prepared to be disgusted.

Strange how things work though, my last post was on the dishonest, morally bankrupt Australian Labour Party. The ALP and its icon on inept Gough Whitlam is still trying to wash the blood of the Balibo five from their hands (not mention the blood of thousands of East Timorese.

Ooops late update: Sooty back in Jakarta and full of his won self importance has demanded a full and formal apology from the Australian Government or "If not, is there any point continuing the relationship between the two countries?"

You would find more than a few Australians agree with you Sooty but not for the same reasons. I concur an apology is due from the OZ Police but that is to the Australian public on why they didn't lock up a person plainly fleeing a legal summons.

In closing, I would on behalf of the Australian Legal System, I would like to para-phrase a recent Australian Tourist Ad...


"SOOTY WHERE THE BLOODY HELL ARE YA!!"


Please come back.......we're waiting

Australia Labour Party and CO2 again

Time for a quick foray into OZ politics again, we see from the picture that the Australian Labour (ho de ho) party is up to its usual standard, with dear dead beat Julia sitting down to enjoy a biscuit with Union Hacks and washed up pop singers. Yep any doubt about the economic direction under labour has now been answered in picture form (on the plus side my USD exchange rate should improve).

In a classic piece of political stupidity, Kevin Rudd (Labour Party Leader)who has been castigating the current government for months over the use of Australian Workplace Agreements (AWA's sort of a personal contract between employee and employer) was woken up by this on the weekend....(ho ho ho..sorry it hurts so much laughing)

"LABOR leader Kevin Rudd faces a new assault over workplace flexibility in the wake of revelations his wife's company employs all her 800 staff under individual contracts and profited from finding jobs for workers to be employed under AWAs"

"Although Mr Rudd has stressed that his wife's company never employed staff under Australian Workplace Agreements, it was revealed yesterday that the company had matched vacancies with jobseekers who were in some cases offered jobs under AWAs, which the Opposition Leader would ban if he is elected prime minister.

Ms Rein confirmed an overseas arm of her company was seeking to recruit German engineers to fill vacant mining jobs in Australia using the controversial 457 visas that Labor has targeted as exploitative in some instances."

See todays Australian Newspaper if you want more details on stupid.

Still on stupids, I had the misfortune to be caught with a lack of reading material on a trip this month and had to resort to that latte sipping supplement Jakarta Kini. If ever there was a magazine dedicated the idle wasteful this is it. In a idle wasteful moment, I confess a quick perusal, only to burst out laughing at one of their regular contributors. His name is John Q something or other. Fair Dinkum, you have to wonder on what planet some of these people live.

Poor JQ, starts with lead in "Climate Change" (soon as you see that title, you know its going be an interesting, factual article) and rapidly runs through the usual boring wank. US and Australia bad because they did not sign the K protocol and Australian ..heaven forbid has the highest per capitia CO2 emissions (of course the fact, that even if Australia stopped producing every single atom of CO2 tomorrow, it would reduce the world output by....wait for it....less that 1%) then manages to fit John Howard as a ultra right wing Prime Minister (oh please) and some how combines the ozone layer as a desert topping for the article.

If you want a great example of woolly green thinking, do grab a copy of Jakarta Kini this month (p.s no good for Kitty litter, too shiny).

Meanwhile, do let me know when someone wants to get serious about this global warming thing, rather than using for a bat to belt the West. It will mean of course, that any new treaty will need to include the worlds great polluters, China, Indonesia, India rather than a wealth transfer mechanism for those to greedy too stop defecating in their own backyards.

UN - Funny name for a whore

“Pissing into the sea” is one of those colourful phrases usually reserved for an endeavour that is a complete waste of time or fruitless. Certainly a phrase that could be used for any reform process in that monstrous waste of taxpayer money and time commonly known as the United Nations.

Of course, you will hear the morons of the world parroting “oh it was not sanctioned by the UN or the international community thinks” What reasonable person gives a bucket of dingo droppings for what the UN thinks?

Let’s review the status of the of the filthy old whore at the moment.

The old UN Commission on Human Rights was dismantled in June last year in a flurry of much demanded reforms (and after acknowledging the UNCHR was an obscene travesty.

The replacement the UN Human Rights Council, sounds good so far with such leading luminaries of Human Rights such as Egypt, Saudi Arabia, China, Cuba, Angola, Azerbaijan… (Are you puking yet?)

Perhaps that’s not fair, I mean they have already made nine resolutions criticising human rights abuses, so they are obviously on the job.

The resolutions, The slaughter of African Muslims in Dafur (Remind anyone of a book ..some are more equal than others?)…nope … Harassment of opposition parties in Zimbabwe..nope… China…Nope…Russia…nope or dare I say even Indonesia’s somewhat patchy record…nope. How about a resolution on Saudi Arabia were women are banned from even driving a car!...nope

All nine resolutions are directed at Israel, including one accusing Israel of transgressing women’s rights…Now I am no great fan of Israel but give me a break…what a bunch on International Wankers!

Some other pearlers

UN Committee on Information: China and Kazakhstan

The UN Commission on Sustainable Development: Chairman Zimbabwe

World Food Program executive board: Sudan and Zimbabwe

UN’s Disarmament Commission: Iran was just elected as vice-chairman,

The UN International Labour Organisation Governing Body (the one lots of union officials and the left wing loons like to appeal to): wait for it … Saudi Arabia (Ask any returning Indonesian Worker how well they are treated in SA).

Perhaps insensitive to mention another country who is on the Human Rights Council but has yet to solved the murder of a HR activist on its national carrier, or bring anyone to account for over a 1000 deaths in 1998 (although it does seem to help your promotion opportunities?). Anyway that would be insensitive so I won’t mention that.

It’s all a joke and not a very nice one. It is well past time that the more rational nations of the world dumped the UN, this dodgy old street whore, with nary a moral fibre left in her stinking, pus ridden body.

Ignore the catcalls and whines of the world slime pits and create a new organisation that actually stands for something. First rule of entry, if you ain’t democracy don’t bother knocking. If you cannot guarantee your own citizens safety and basic human rights…ditto.

As for the rest of you, hey none asked you to join, fill ya boots on someone else’s dollar.

Acknowledgement: A lot of the idea for this and even some direct pinches are from a bloke by the name of James Allan (Professor of Law). Thanks James

GLOBAL WARMING...

Al...AL Where are you????????????..You promised the ICE WAS MELTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DILBERT GOES NUCLEAR

As promised, more from the National Office of Shallow Thought (also known as Indonesian Nuclear Technology Supervisory Agency)

Now just because I do not support the wholesale alarmist calls of the more radical Green groups does not mean (as some have suggested) that we at the stump are blind to moronic plans to turn us all into glowing mutants.

With Indonesian’s Nuclear Power proposal even Blind Freddy could see that a Nuclear Power Plant/Industry in Indonesia would be an unmitigated economic and environmental disaster! Fortunately, us ANTI – NUKES have secret ally in fighting such a proposal, none other than the Nuclear Technology Supervisory Agency itself. Even the dullest moss rock upon reading the tripe that issues forth from this tomb of creative thought would be left in any doubt that Indonesia is not ready for a Nuclear Industry.

Risk Management is a fairly basic industry requirement (any industry) requiring a risk management study to be performed before any project is begun. This requires an honest and open assessment of any and all risks in the project that may be encountered. Fortunately, our very own agency has come up with these RISK MANAGEMENT “Howlers” to keep us all amused.

"All forms of technology involve certain risks, but since the early development of our reactors we have surveyed all probabilities”.

All probabilities???? Very godlike, most professional risk management strategies at least have the humility to allow for the unforeseen in some fashion but not these guys! Direct line to the Gods apparently.

"Regulations oblige us to choose power plant technology that has been proven safe, rather than new, untested technology,"

One assume these are similar to the regulations and regulated in the same manner that ensure our “SAFE” air travel, sea travel and train travel.

“Many Asian countries frequently affected by earthquakes such as Japan and Korea had long been developing their own nuclear power plants. Japan has built more than 50 power plants and South Korea has built more than 20 power plants. Japan is often hit by earthquakes but has avoided nuclear accidents. Why are we so worried about risks we are able to anticipate?"

Honest assessments of the risk remember? Is our Agency of Stupid suggesting that Indonesia is on technological par with South Korea and Japan? Sheesh.. There comes a time that even self delusion needs medication before we do serious harm! Seriously, we have not even been able to dig a flood mitigation channel in our capital city in 60 years or maintain a sidewalk fit for pedestrians, on what planet do we think we could maintain a Nuclear Power Plant?

What kind of self serving, dodgy risk management study has been done if you cannot even acknowledge that countries like Japan and South Korea just might just have a technological edge on Indonesia.

Ok maybe I am a cynic, but with a radio-active fallout having a half life of hundreds if not thousands of years, surely we are entitled ask…”WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU THINKING?”

Of course, it would naïve to think this about bettering the lives of the general populace. Everyone knows that Nuclear Power Plants are hideously expensive and there would be MEGA BUCKS to be made. You can just see Ma Baker (ie) and the boys waiting for honey pot(pun intended) to be opened.

For those who do think I am being overly cynical perhaps you could point me to something/anything that would put our hearts at rest that we could trust these guys not to make us glow green in the night!

As a side issue, I have never understood the concept of why Nuke Power in Indonesia (or Iran for that matter). Millions of tonnes of free coal, free gas and free oil in the ground but Indonesia just sells it off and seeks in import hideously expensive glow in the dark technology. Less to do with a realistic approach to a problem and more to do with macho erections and mega bucks perhaps.

I don’t claim to a economist, but surely one way out of the power crisis (without glowing green) would be to build into future coal, oil contracts a requirement to build and supply fuel for public access power stations, the cost of which could be offset against normally paid taxes and royalties. This would mean there would be fewer opportunities for the parasites of this country to sneak their fingers into the honey jar, so it won’t happen anytime soon, don’t hold your breath waiting ok.

Anyway for those who would like to read the silliest statement made in support of Nuclear Energy, check out May 9th edition of the Jakarta Post. Once again where are our reporters to challenge such blatant “Dilbert” statements? Seriously guys/girls there is more to reporting than spewing out mindless press releases on behalf of some self serving public servant (Ok its a risk using that term here).

Disclaimer:
1. I am actually a supporter of Nuclear Energy, but why I would trust the blokes talking and speaking so far to organize a hooker in a knock shop

2. Sorry about the picture, I was looking for mutants and found “Communist Mutants From Outer Space”..Gotta love the title anyway

From Breadbasket to basketcase

After having seen their work up close, I am not a big fan of the United Nations . With some very notable personal exceptions, at best the UN could reasonably be called inept, corrupt and nothing more than a talkfest (and I do excise WHO from this assessment, which has done some remarkable things for humanity over the years).

However the UN does provide grim amusement (?) from time to time. The latest in grim insanity is ZIMBABWE has been elected to head a key UN environmental commission. Despite ruining its economy and being under sanctions for human rights abuses, Zimbabwe was elected by a 26-21 vote and will replace Qatar as the head of the UN Commission on Sustainable Development.

Sustainable development???????? An inflation rate of 2200% unable to meet more than 50% of its food needs for the coming year and an 80% poverty rate from a country than was once renown as Africa's bread basket. What the hell is going on in the UN, I can only assume WHO is trialing new drugs within the UN.

Sheesh next thing you know.. they will be appointing countries who cannot guarantee human rights activists will not be murdered on their National Carrier to the human rights commission.

The more it goes on the more, the more stump thinks perhaps its time for a new Organisation with entry requirements based more on actions rather than political correctness. For those that don't like it .., those who cannot get entry, those who suddenly find the money trough has dried up, ...stiff..get your act together or complain to the UN, the stump is sure they will write a very mean letter to someone.

Later in the week, the stump will keep with the insanity theme and discuss the latest howlers from temple of stupid, the Indonesian Nuclear Support Agency (ok..I forget the actual name ..how about "the office of shallow thought"). However as taste, check this out for a quote gushing from the office of shallow thought in support of a Indonesian Nuclear Power Industry.

“Many Asian countries frequently affected by earthquakes such as Japan and Korea had long been developing their own nuclear power plants. "

Gee there is so much wrong with that sentence its scary! Perhaps we should also compare Japan and Korea's air, rail and sea transport industry as well just to see how far we need to go before we start playing with things that kill people for thousands of years. Still more later..

Howard and the Loony Left

Wow..they are everywhere! Must be the rutting season!


Back in oz, the last few months all the talk has been about the upcoming election and how Prime Minister'sward's Government will fall. Naturally, the very thought of John Howard being defeated has the loony left in an absolute orgasmic lather of anticipation.


As usual however, Howard sat back and waited for the Opposition Party (Australian Labour Party..a misnomer if ever there was..perhaps Australian Public Trough Party would be better) to self destruct.


Lo and behold, Julia Gillard, the Opposition's workplace relations spokeswoman (who's main claim to fame seems to have never had a job that was not funded by other workers), warned business it could be "injured" if it chose to become a propagandist for John Howard on industrial relations.


Gotta love that election strategy, threaten and black mail business in the run up to an election..but wait there's more..


Ms Gillard said that during an election year, the political contest was a "pretty hard, fast place to be".
"It's a contact sport, if you like, with a lot of injury," she said. "I don't think it's a wise place for Australian business to be out on the field in the fray getting those injuries on the way through."


You can read the rest of the article in today's paper


Julia, our little public funded, protected koala bear you are about to find out just how rough the fray can get! Could you be more stupid telling the nation's industry and wealth generators, they should have no interest or say in an election year.. Who should be free to have the only opinion? Little leftist dreamers, knocking back lattes at the public funded university, perhaps the worn out, "public" broadcaster hacks or maybe a aged, compromised pop singer? ....


For those that hate John Howard, get ready for a few more years.. Don't blame us voters, blame the loons who provide no choice!


Julia and the rest of the loony left, this is for you from the real world, where people have to have access to jobs and work for a living.

NAZI BASTARDS

Funny how things come together, this week I seem to be stuck in my semi-annual anti-rabid green (and yet I consider myself a environmently aware person) anti left, anti socialist frame of mind and I come across this.

- We demand that the State shall make it its primary duty to provide a livelihood for its citizens. - The abolition of incomes unearned by work.
- The breaking of the slavery of interest.
- Personal enrichment from war must be regarded as a crime against the nation. We demand therefore the ruthless confiscation of all war profits.
- We demand the nationalization of all businesses which have been formed into corporations (trusts) (Sound familiar yet?).
- We demand profit-sharing in large industrial enterprises (perhaps now?).
- We demand the extensive development of insurance for old age.
- We demand the passing of a law for the expropriation of land for communal purposes without compensation.
- The State must consider a thorough reconstruction of our national system of education. The aim of the school must be to give the pupil, beginning with the first sign of intelligence, a grasp of the nation of the State (through the study of civic affairs).
- The State must ensure that the nation's health standards are raised by protecting mothers and infants, by prohibiting child labor.
- We demand the abolition of the mercenary army and the foundation of a people's army.
- The publishing of papers which are not conducive to the national welfare must be forbidden.
- Our nation can achieve permanent health only from within on the basis of the principle: The common interest before self-interest.
- To put the whole of this program into effect, we demand the creation of a strong central state power.

I think that about covers the general position of our leftish, green hued friends... not bad charter really ..bloke who wrote it went on to make a bit of name for himself..Adolf Hitler Feb 1920.

I stole this from a right bastard over at BASTARDS INC

Greens Nazis and Taxes

It comes as no surprise that some have taken me to task for daring to question the new gods and their acolytes of this new century. The new Green God revolution is far nastier the tie-tied version of the 70's and 80's and there isn't even free love involved anymore.

Oh no the new Green Gods, demand absolute loyalty and unquestioning, slavish devotion to the cause. Dare to question any part of the message be it global warming, all corporate is bad, everything western is bad.. then crucifixion is the best you can hope for.

A key plank of the Green God altar is a sort of slime green socialism (how many times do we have to go do this road before we realise it doesn't work..sigh). This slime green socialism means anyone who has the nerve to try and rise above the morass of sameness shall be taxed into submission.

On taxes ..perhaps a slice of the real world might help...

Suppose that every day, ten men go out for beer and the bill for all ten comes to $100. If they paid their bill the way we pay our taxes, it would go something like this:

The first four men (the poorest) would pay nothing. The fifth would pay $1. The sixth would pay $3. The seventh would pay $7. The eighth would pay $12. The ninth would pay $18. The tenth man (the richest) would pay $59.
So, that's what they decided to do.

The ten men drank in the bar every day and seemed quite happy with the arrangement, until one day, the owner threw them a curve. 'Since you areall such good customers,' he said, 'I'm going to reduce the cost of yourdaily beer by $20. 'Drinks for the ten now cost just $80.

The group still wanted to pay their bill the way we pay our taxes so thefirst four men were unaffected. They would still drink for free. But what about the other six men - the paying customers? How could they divide the$20 windfall so that everyone would get his 'fair share?'

They realized that $20 divided by six is $3.33. But if they subtracted that from everybody's share, then the fifth man and the sixth man would each end up being paid to drink his beer. So, the bar owner suggested that it would be fair to reduce each man's bill by roughly the same amount, and he proceeded to work out the amounts each should p ay.

And so: The fifth man, like the first four, now paid nothing (100% savings). The sixth now paid $2 instead of $3 (33%savings). The seventh now pay $5 instead of $7 (28%savings). The eighth now paid $9 instead of $12 (25% savings). The ninth now paid $14 instead of $18 (22% savings). The tenth now paid $49 instead of $59 (16% savings).

Each of the six was better off than before. And the first four continued to drink for free.

But once outside the restaurant, the men began to compare their savings. 'I only got a dollar out of the $20,'declared the sixth man. He pointed to the tenth man,' but he got $10!' 'Yeah, that's right,' exclaimed the fifth man. 'I only saved a dollar,too. It's unfair that he got ten times more than I!' 'That's true!!' shouted the seventh man. 'Why should he get $10 back when I got only two? The wealthy get all the breaks!' 'Wait a minute,' yelled the first four men in unison. 'We didn't get anything at all. The system exploits the poor!' The nine men surrounded the tenth and beat him up.

The next night the tenth man didn't show up for drinks, so the nine sat down and had beers without him. But when it came time to pay the bill, they discovered something important. They didn't have enough money between all of them for even half of the bill!

And that, boys and girls, journalists and college professors, is how our tax system works. The people who pay the highest taxes get the most benefit from a tax reduction.

Tax them too much, attack them for being wealthy, and they just may not show up anymore. In fact, they might start drinking overseas where the atmosphere is somewhat friendlier.

David R. Kamerschen,
Ph.D.Professor of Economics
University of Georgia

For those who understand, no explanation is needed. For those who do notunderstand, no explanation is possible.

LAZY NGO'S

Been “jalan jalan lagi” but strangely that had little effect on the world. The world didn’t stop and wait for me to get back.

I see the Newmont trial is over and Mr. Ness and the company has been acquitted of pollution and environmental damage charges. Based on newspaper reports of mishandled evidence, false reports and various other agenda driven slanders, it remains bizarre that the process took this long.

It’s a shame that various NGO still have not realised the damage to their credibility this case has done to them. It’s a bigger shame the NGO’s have compromised themselves just when Indonesia needs a reliable and transparent environmental watchdog the most. Its time for some leadership reviews and not just in the corporate world.

Here’s a tip …..’Walli’s” of the world, take a trip out to Surabaya and go play in the toxic mud brought to us by the Brothers Grimm. Perhaps out there you may regain some perspective.

Meanwhile a recent strike at Freeport, Papua raised a number of comments around the blogsphere. Predictably (and some what of a yawn), it was the mostly the “BIG BAD MULTINATIONAL” biased comments flowing again.

Invariably, the calls from the rabid green are to close the mine down and pay compensation (based on what??) and return the land to the people.

Of course, you never hear of what will replace the mine as the single biggest taxpayer in Indonesia. Perhaps a payroll tax on the ojek drivers?

In this strike, native Papuans wanted to a pay rise to over 3 times the national average and were concerned that Javanese were always given preference to Papuans in recruitment and career options.

The recruitment and promotion of Javanese over other ethnic groups is an explosive issue throughout many of the provinces. Decades of unequal school funding and “transmigration” policies have left many provinces way behind their Javanese cousins and this has yet to reach its crisis point. Although its safe to say the government does not have a lot time left to act.

The Papuans have every right to demand more opportunities from the wealth taken from their land. I can’t help but think their anger is misdirected. Any company is going to select its employees from the most qualified. A better question is where have the taxes and royalties gone? Why haven’t we got the best schools and hospitals in Indonesia based on out input to the national coffers? These are not questions that Freeport is responsible for.

The other issue is getting paid over three times the National Average. I know makes the NGO’s and other rabids feel all warm and fuzzy. Yippee!! We have screwed a few more bucks of our wealth back from the evil multi national!

Its short sighted, immature and devastates the communities involved. Basic supply and demand principles mean than market prices rise to the level the consumer can afford to pay (Hero Bali vs Hero Solo). Unless you can afford to employ every member of that community, you have condemned those without access to those higher wages to even greater poverty. (Does anyone want to take a bet that the price of a bag of rice in Papua does not double on the basis of the new wages?)


Perhaps instead of chasing ghosts and glory, the WALLI’s of this world could actually develop and propose viable working plans that ensure “All” of the community advances on the back of the natural bounty of the land.

Of course, this would require a bit of thought and planning. You cannot go changing the rules halfway thru the game .. UPFRONT AND TRANSPARENT

ANZAC DAY

They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old;

Age shall not weary them,

nor the years condemn.

At the going down of the sun and in the morning

We will remember them.

LEST WE FORGET

A Tribute to the mothers of the fallen from Turkish Ruler "Ataturk" in 1934

Those heroes that shed their blood and lost their lives... You are now lying in the soil of a friendly country. Therefore rest in peace. There is no difference between the Johnnies and the Mehmets to us where they lie side by side now here in this country of ours... you, the mothers, who sent their sons from faraway countries wipe away your tears; your sons are now lying in our bosom and are in peace. After having lost their lives on this land. They have become our sons as well.

(Turkey became a republic in 1923 and Ataturk became the first president. Ataturk (then Kemal) commanded the Turkish defences against the ANZACS)

ANZAC Day - 25 April

This day-is probably Australia's most important national occasion. It marks the anniversary of the first major military action fought by Australian and New Zealand forces during the First World War. ANZAC stands for Australian and New Zealand Army Corps. The soldiers in those forces quickly became known as ANZACs, and the pride they soon took in that name endures to this day.

Why is this day so special to Australians?
When war broke out in 1914 Australia had been a federal commonwealth for only fourteen years. The new national government was eager to establish its reputation among the nations of the world. In 1915 Australian and New Zealand soldiers formed part of the allied expedition that set out to capture the Gallipoli peninsula to open the way to the Black Sea for the allied navies. The plan was to capture Constantinople (now Istanbul), capital of the Ottoman Empire and an ally of Germany. They landed at Gallipoli on 25 April, meeting fierce resistance from the Turkish defenders. What had been planned as a bold stroke to knock Turkey out of the war quickly became a stalemate, and the campaign dragged on for eight months. At the end of 1915 the allied forces were evacuated after both sides had suffered heavy casualties and endured great hardships. Over 8,000 Australian soldiers were killed. News of the landing at Gallipoli made a profound impact on Australians at home and 25 April quickly became the day on which Australians remembered the sacrifice of those who had died in war.

Though the Gallipoli campaign failed in its military objectives of capturing Constantinople and knocking Turkey out of the war, the Australian and New Zealand troops' actions during the campaign bequeathed an intangible but powerful legacy. The creation of what became known as an "Anzac legend" became an important part of the national identity of both nations. This shaped the ways they viewed both their past and their future.

BASTARDS, BULLIES AND TROLLS

Before we start on grimmer topics today, “Greenant” has been on the job and has reported our resident Troll, who likes to impersonate a Indonesian Man is actually a woman (actually a big hairy woman) from Oz. You know the type, sarong wearing dyke westerner, strutting around the local village, the male hater, sucking the public teat for sustenance, Stay tuned for more details..Thanks Greenant, certainly explains the penis envy.


Bullies and Bastards

A few weeks ago, I was reading the local paper and there was the picture of a group graduating pilots, blindfolded and being forced to sit drums of filthy oil and trash whilst their Non Commissioned Officers and other seniors looked on. The name for this is bullying and bastardisation in its lowest form.

Besides a fleeting thought, that is it any wonder that the Military has the reputation it does, I thought no more about it.

Until today..The Jakarta Post reports that another student had died from bullying at the Institute of Public Administration (IPDN). The IPDN is a quasi military school for wanna be public servants (which is a misnomer in its own right). This is not the first time this hell hole of thugs has being in the news, a senior lecturer at the school reported “34 students had died at IPDN since 1993”

Safe to assume that the “head” of the school has been dismissed and awaiting police investigation..Nope.

“Authorities at the Institute of Public Administration (IPDN) suspended a lecturer Lecturer Inu Kencana Syafi'i on Monday after he spoke publicly on the death of a sophomore student and other violence at the college”

Now can you imagine the carnage and mayhem if such things were reported as happening in an American Prison …Still that’s the way things are here “Howl at the moon and the Middle East” Threaten violence and mayhem over a fully clad Playboy whilst tripping over far greater excesses in your own back yard.
Here’s is the full article from the JP as linking to the post is waste of time

IPDN lecturer suspended over violence report
Yuli Tri Suwarni, The Jakarta Post, Sumedang
Authorities at the Institute of Public Administration (IPDN) suspended a lecturer on Monday after he spoke publicly on the death of a sophomore student and other violence at the college.
Lecturer Inu Kencana Syafi'i said that if the suspension was a punishment then it was unjust and did not correspond with his work to stop brutality at the academy.

Inu sent a letter to President Susilo Bambang Yudhoyono informing him that 34 students had died at IPDN since 1993, 17 of whom are believed to have died in suspicious circumstances.
"I sent him the letter this morning enclosing data on the deaths of the college students in order to set it straight that I'm not making this up. Not all the students died of unnatural causes apparently, but I have specified the irregular ones," he was quoted by Detikcom as saying at his official house in the IPDN lecturers' housing complex in Jatinangor, Sumedang, on Monday.

In the report shown to reporters, he said 34 students had died from 1993 to 2007, the most recent case being the death of sophomore Cliff Muntu from North Sulawesi. He highlighted the names of students whom he alleged died of unnatural causes.

On May 8, 1993, according to Inu's report, Aliyan, from West Kalimantan, fell from the second floor of the Bengkulu dormitory. Also that year, the report says, an East Java student, Gatot, was found dead with bruises on his chest and broken ribs after attending basic military training.
"I saw the condition of the student with my own eyes," said Inu.

The report says that in 1995, Alfian, from Lampung, was found dead with a fractured skull in his dormitory and in 1997 Fahruddin from Central Java died of unnatural causes. College authorities refused to allow doctors to perform an autopsy on him, according to the report.
In 1999, Edy, whose origin is not listed in the report, died during a field study and, Inu says, the institute also refused an autopsy on him. In 2000, Arizal, from South Sulawesi, was believed to have drowned in Lake Toba, North Sumatra. Purwanto, from Central Java, was found dead with broken ribs after graduating from the college in 2000.

In the same year, Obeth Nego Indow, from Papua, died in his senior's room with blood in his mouth and broken ribs, the report alleges.
In March 2000, a West Java student Eri Rahman, died in hospital after being beaten by seniors, who were sent to prison, but allowed to graduate after they served their sentences.
In 2000, a student from Jakarta, Utari Mustika, allegedly bled to death after an abortion. Her body was left in a mosque in Cimahi, West Java.

On July 25, 2002, Teddy Frederich Hendra, from Maluku, drowned and his body was found floating in the sea off Cilacap. In 2002, South Sulawesi student Wirman Nurman died. The college claimed he died in a traffic accident. In 2003, Wahyu Hidayat, from West Java, died after allegedly being beaten by his seniors. In 2004, Arizal Sasad, from Central Java, died. College officials told his parents he had died in a traffic accident.

In 2005, Irfan Albert Hibo, from Papua, died in his room and college officials said he committed suicide by taking insecticide, although it was later alleged that he died of a drug overdose.
In 2006, Papuan student Manfred Hubi, died at IPDN's IIP branch campus in Cilandak, Jakarta. College officials claimed he died of acute hepatitis, but they again refused to allow an autopsy.

"The difference between my data and that of the IPDN officials, which indicated that 29 students had died, is because theirs did not include students who died mysteriously and whose bodies were not examined," Inu said.
Inu received the suspension letter, signed by IPDN assistant rector Tjahja Supriatna, on Sunday.

"I don't understand it. They say I don't have to teach as long as I have to deal with the investigative team," said Inu, who has been teaching at the college for 17 years.
He also alleged that lecturers had used formaldehyde to hide bruises on Cliff's body, and asked why they had not been questioned.


Yep... COVER IT UP AND CONTINUE AS NORMAL

Australian Labour Party

(Cartoon: Labour Party burnt out pop star trying to remember what he stands for, with coaching from kid rudd)

Election time is coming up in Australia, which normally would not be much of an issue in Indonesia except that the current Prime Minister seems to be a favourite of Indcoup and Treespotter. So I thought I would dedicate a post on the theory that a rotting fish, rots from the head first.

Personally, I have never had much time for John Howard as I consider him as a more than economical with the truth when it suits him and just a little sneaky. Having said that, there is no doubt he is the consummate professional politician in the region bar none.

Time and again, the Australian Labour Party has thrown up challenges to the throne, only to find their chosen challengers, weak kneed bullies (Latham) intellectual ravers (Beasley) and their latest puff balloon of choice Kevin Rudd. Kevin Rudd’s latest claim to glory (besides never ever being able to answer a question with a straight answer) is this latest PR disaster:
“VIETNAM veterans have been offended by Labor leader Kevin Rudd’s request for a “fake” dawn service so he can commemorate Anzac Day live on Channel Seven’s breakfast show from Long Tan in Vietnam.
The plan for an earlier 4.15am service to coincide with the peak 7.15am morning TV ratings period were hatched by Mr Rudd’s office and staff of the Sunrise show several weeks ago.”


Few days hold greater reverence to Australian’s than ANZAC day and for some mealy mouthed spiv like Rudd to suggest the timings held in remembrance of the fallen be changed to suit his own inflated sense of self importance is repulsive in the extreme.
Rudd like the party he represents has demonstrated yet again they have no idea what is important to the average Australian and will self-destruct long before Election Day handing Howard yet another election on a platter…idiots.


To be fair, you cannot expect much from a political party, laced with Union Hacks, taxpayer funded leftist journalists and barely literate, washed up, bubble gum pop stars. You would have to dig long and hard in the Australian Labour Party to find anyone who has actually contributed to the economy of Australia and not spent their whole lives somewhere on the taxpayer teat.


As a twist, my own motives and ethics will be tested in this election. With the Australian Dollar at .80 USD up from .48c back in 2000. A vote for the economic disaster that is the Labour Party could only be good for my wallet but bad for the country...(Ok..Only kidding!! Only a fool, welfare cheats or at the risk of repeating myself, a socialist could vote for the rotting fish that is the Australian Labour Party).


Brace yourself for a few more years of Howard.

ANGRY EASTER

Not everyone is excited about Easter and that egg brother thing

Frisco Rises for Easter

Frisk0dude on his recent release from captivy, as his mom said "I can't remember his name but his face rings a bell

Hey GOOD NEWS..

In a fitting tribute to Easter, Friskodude

has arisen from the dead. After going missing for many months, leading to several rumours to do with wet suits, babyoil and large overly friendly elephants, he has emerged to blog again.

Mind you he is still a bastard coz he has not come clean with all the "whys and wherefores" to his disappearance.

We now return you our quest for the best of Indonesia.

Indonesian Quest

"Indonesia Most Liveable" has generated some very interesting comments and
Jakartass has added his considerable influence to assist in the Greenstump quest. Thanks J.

I am hoping for some comments/advice on various regions from the Indonesian Perspective. I did get one comment from the resident blogshpere "expat pretending to be Indonesian" but included it for low class humour value only and it certianly doesn't count as an Indonesian Perspective Comment.

Based on the information so far, some future locations are already penciled in for a visit in the very near future. Bitangs on the beach, relaxing in the rainforest sounds so nice but in the meantime

"I am sitting in my dingy little office,
where a stingy ray of sunlight struggles feebly down between the houses tall,
And the foetid air and gritty of the dusty, dirty city
Through the open window floating, spreads its foulness over all.

And in place of lowing cattle, I can hear the fiendish rattle
Of the tramways and the buses making hurry down the street,
And the language uninviting of the gutter children fighting,
Comes fitfully and faintly through the ceaseless tramp of feet.

And the hurrying people daunt me,
and their pallid faces haunt me
As they shoulder one another in their rush and nervous haste,
With their eager eyes and greedy,
and their stunted forms and weedy,
For townsfolk have no time to grow, they have no time to waste

With a few more suggestions, perhaps we could develop an intineray purely based on Indonesian bloggers recommendations. A bloggers intinerary?? ...Mmm what would we call it "The Blogger's Run"...naagh... sounds a little to Hash House Harriers to me and might scare off the more "relaxed" bloggers out there. Suggestions anyone?

If this keeps going perhaps a new blog, with pictures and comments from our bloggers on each place..the mind boggles or is that bloggles.

Indonesia Most Liveable

Jakartass recently reminded me that there are yet many places in Indonesia, I have yet to visit. We can too easily get set in our ways and forget that Indonesia is huge and diverse place so.........

I intend to be around in Indonesia for some time and shall now launch on a new mission:

To find Indonesia's most liveable province/city/town/village.

Naturally any such quest would be highly subjective, in my case the following would have to be considered:

1. Tolerant and FPI (and assorted other nutters) free;

2. Progessive Schooling;

3. Unpolluted;

4. Adhence to basic rule of law;

5. Beach/Mountain vistas;

6. Access - roads, rail, airports;

7. Infrastructure;

8. Traditional as opposed to imported culture;

9. Friendly, open society;

9 ...Eeer.. I will think of more and I open to suggestions .

A dream list is one thing, reality is different and life is a trade-off. It should be fun and I really would like suggestions on where to start, who knows I might learn something despite being an "Ol Dog". In the meantime, some thoughts:

Jakarta: Nice (make that interesting) to visit but who would want to live there? A city self destructing after generations of uncontrolled growth and poor planning. Is this not the world's polluted city?

Bandung: Seriously pretty, particularly up in the mountains. Bandung is (was) great, all the facilities of a big city, progessive, no serious traffic issues and then...they built the tollroad!!! Vale Bandung. However general area remains a favourite, perhaps a town close by?

Papua: Talk about views..talk about nature at its best. Is this not one of the last true paradises on Earth? Unfortunately, any place under a media black-out obviously has some very ugly secrets.

Kalimantan: I think we missed it, unless you are into seeing vast Oil Palm plantations or worse vacant, eroded hillsides where virgin forests used to stand, then Kalimantan's glory days are past. I have no doubt that Kalimantan will gain prominance again in the future as a symbol of short sighted greed and contempt for the environment. Furture generations will curse their forebears every time Kalimantan is mentioned.

Bali: Island of the Gods under attack from within and without. Still in my opinion, one of the most interesting cultures in Indonesia. Do yourself a favour a read some history of Bali before you go (preferably not the sanatised versions printed in Indonesia). To live there..I would need to travel to some of the more remote places I think.

Others...heaps..suggestions, comments

John Howard goes green.

Well one thing you can say about Western Governments they are slow learners! The Australian Government is proving particulary thick in a field with some very dense over achievers.

Despite having its own water and de-forestation crisis (ok the water crisis is a crock, as the only reason there is one is because everytime a new dam was proposed the the loony deep greenies blocked it...increase in population..no increase in water storage for last twenty years..oh my...we are running out of water!! ...Knuckle draggers!)

As I was saying, despite have their own problems and that the only return for money splashed all over South East Asia is a royal pain in the arse, Australian Prime Minister, John Winston Howard yesterday pledged to buy scores of luxury homes in Jakarta and Singapore..Thanks for coming sucker!

Green Workers and Green Trees

We all have them, those pivotal moments in a plan where we make a decision and run with it, only think later “Damn, hadn’t thought of that”!

This is one such story. A couple hours from where I live is a nice little town and from an outsider’s point of view the Wali Kota (Mayor) has/is doing a very good job. The streets are clean, there is a garbage service and generally the town infrastructure is sound. Of course, like the majority of Indonesia, basic amenities like power and water remain sporadic at best, however that is well outside the local Wali Kota’s control.

Along with clean streets a significant work force is employed to ensure the Parks and Gardens are maintained. This is where the pivotal plan moment kicks in, its very easy to imagine.

Scene: The bosses all sitting around admiring their new Blackberrys (in tandem with the second compulsory “mistress phone”).

First Official “Ok, we have got these Parks and Gardens up and running and have a new budget for uniforms”

Second Official “Great, that should keep every one happy, what is the design”

First Official “I was thinking Parks and Gardens, its obvious the uniform should be Green”

Second Official “ Great Idea, lets do it maybe we will get mention in the Stern Report”

Three weeks later…

First Official “We seem to be going through a lot of Parks and Gardens workers’

Second Official “Why, they not happy? We bought them uniforms”

First Official "That’s the trouble, most of our Gardens are in the middle of the roads, with the green uniforms, the workers look just like bushes until they stand up in front of the on-rushing bus”

Second Official “Sheesh, our poor workers, Green seemed such a good idea. I wonder what the last thing is going through their mind when the bus hits them"

First Official “Their arse”

HAPPY PHONE RINGS = END SCENE

Ferrys and Braveheart

Not a lot of posts lately, still tripping around. Its always an interesting activity and you see lots of WTF sights. However I would like to take the time to express my admiration for the "Ferry Operators" of Indonesia. You would think with the raft of recent transport disasters the operators would be too scared to move unless everything was just right and perfect.

Naaghh Maybe not!
Now I don't claim to be a qaulified Captain (well of ferries anyway) but I would think the first rule in ocean safety would be close the doors before we set off?

Or if you must transport a truck load of flammable fluid on a passenger/car ferry then have someone standby with a fire extinguisher?

Oh well, the Greenstump rule of ferry travel remains.

Park the vehicle, quick as possible to the top deck, pick your jumping off spot, carry a two litre plastic drink bottle as it provides more than enough flotation for someone who can swim more than 50M.

Don't bother with the Life Buoys as they are normally triple knotted to the ship to stop people knocking them off. This of course can be hassle if the ferry sinks in water deeper than the rope reach to the Life Buoy.

Vanquished Forests

Recently “Kompas” a local newspaper revealed that Indonesia had the dubious honour of being the number one nation in de-forestation for 2006. This was quickly followed by the news on the weekend that Indonesia is now number three in the world as a major contributor to CO2 emissions behind the United States and China.

The number 3 rating is much undeserved and should be protested. With correct score weightings, Indonesia should have easily achieved the number one rating in both divisions. It should be noted that in both China’s and the United States, there are at least payoffs to the nation’s populace with increased access to power and in most cases an increase in the standard of living (albeit at someone’s expense).

In the case of Indonesia, the increased CO2 emissions are not due to the production of electricity or services to the public. Rather the CO2 is a direct result of uncontrolled burning off, deforestation and peat burning. All of which line the pockets of the chosen few at the expense of the rest of the population. This way everybody loses.

Last week I had the opportunity to see for myself the devastation to the forests wrought by the chosen few. Thought we would take a long drive and see the much abused tropical forest before it was all gone!.. Bugger me, if the forest didn’t drive right past us (see picture)

My Indonesian comrade was moved to say “I hate these guys”! Apparently ever since the supposed clamp down on illegal logging, all they have done is change their methods. Instead of huge mills in the jungle, they employ poor local villagers to operate small, portable mills and have them deliver the logs to the side of the road. These small two or three men operations disappear every time there is word of a Police raid (sadly, the raids always received plenty of advance warning).

Once on the road, the logs are picked up by trucks picking up timber, like bemos (bus) on a passenger run.

Asking the obvious “What about the trucks? Don’t they get stopped by the Police”? With an obvious pity for my poor grasp of the situation, my comrade just rubbed his thumb and forefinger together.

Poor Fella, My Country

Still on the conservation front, the lamest interview this year goes to the spokesman for Nuclear Power in Indonesia (whose name is forgettable as is his grasp of the issues, but see last weekend’s Jakarta Post it you want to send a dill a card).

After several column inches of vague assurances and dubious science, his finishing statement was essentially, “Don’t Worry, even if there was an accident, the government would pay compensation”..??????????????????????

I wonder what the formulae are for compensation for radio active fallout which lasts hundreds of years! About the same for mudflows, I am guessing.

Perth, Singapore

Recently had a good excuse to spend time in Perth, Australia this last fortnight. Perth certainly deserves its reputation as the most beautiful city in Australia, if a little er..quiet after 10pm. I am sure if you were a local there would be plenty of places to enjoy but as a tourist...shhhh..I think everyone's asleep! After Indonesia where there seems to people carrying on with their lives 24 hours a day, its a bit of a culture shock to be staring down the main street of a major city with nary a soul to be seen.

Best of all got to spend a few days in SINGAPORE, which just so happened to have a huge parade every night down Orchard Road.

Life can be Good !

Check out the parade in Singapore (Gotta love them Singapore Girls) and the beach right out side our hotel in oz.

Indonesian Playboys

Many years ago when I first came to Indonesia, friend took me aside and said “Welcome to Bizzaro Land, where nothing is as it seems where yes means no and No means maybe”
He went on to explain (with some accuracy it was proven as time past) that Indonesia was a place that would bring you to the very depths of despair only to be followed the very next day with an overwhelming urge to spend the rest of your life here.

Incredible natural beauty contrasted with the ugliness of unchecked pollution and plundering. Vast wealth walking hand in hand with abject poverty. Loving family links to which most westerners have never experienced often coupled with an absolute disregard for their fellow Indonesian. It’s an interesting ride to say the least.

Why do I bring this up, well yesterday was really one of those “Bizarro Land” moments
Only in a Alternate universe could this happen,

A mother with four children poisons her children and then kills herself because her husband has run away and she has no money to feed, clothe or school her children (one was just a babe in arms).

A child dies in it's father arms from malnourishment

Hundreds of people die in plane crashes, Ferry burnings and Train smashes in a period of weeks.

Thousands of people are homeless due unchecked volcanic mudflows, with the company reportedly responsible during little expect ducking and weaving.

Now in a sane world you would think that a Minister for People’s Welfare and a Transport Minister would have at least a case to answer. Nope, here in Bizarre land we charge the editor of a lame verson of Playboy Magazine. His crime; damaging the country’s morals and “making the people uneasy” and further we demand he is sentenced to two years Gaol. All played to a background of bucktoothed, illegal immigrants, moral fanatics and their sheep

I am going out on limb here, and suggest it is not a Lame, Dated Magazine that makes Indonesians and anyone else with an ounce of humanity uneasy. Its pictures and stories of children dying, mothers so desperate they kill their own children. That’s obscene! That’s Offensive…..That’s so sad it breaks your heart.

Every one of you thieving, miserable, self serving, greedy, inbred, vile, vomitous fat bastards sitting in your ivory towers, scamming your next rip-off, should be forced to have a 8x10 glossy picture of those children on your desk, so you can see what you are responsible for every bloody day! You are morally bankrupt Playboys of Indonesia.

The people really do deserve so much more than this..

Cromwell, Indonesia and Babies

Back again! Due to picking up a very nasty bug that would not go away, I spent a bit of time in Perth, Australia. Perth would have to be one of the most beautiful cities in the world although somewhat islolated and bloody hot 43c, but great beach weather!!

I had plenty of time to catch on my reading, some very good and very very bad books out there. During my literary excursion, I came across this little extract from Oliver Cromwell's 1653 dissolution of the English Long Parliment.


"Its high time for me to put an end to your sitting in this place, which you have dishonoured by your contemptof all virtue and defiled by your practice of every vice. Ye are a factious crew and enemies of all good goverment.

Ye are a pack of mercenary wretches and would like Esau. sell your country for a mess of pottage, and like Judas betray your God for a few pieces of money. Is there a single virtue now remaining amongst you? Is there one vice you do not possess?

Ye have no more religion than my horse! Which of you have not bartered your conscience for brides?...Ye are grown intolerably odious to the whole nation. You were deputed to get grievances redressed; are you not yourselves the greatest grievance?

Depart immediately - go, get you out, make haste youye venal slaves begone!
Lock up the doors""

Say what you like about Ol Ollie, he had a way with words and I could think of a mass mailing address for this speech myself.

Taking a decent amount of time off does bring some persective back into your life,.You can get overwhelmed, confused, frustrated, happy, sad, estatic, depressed living in Indonesia as an expat.

Somethings will never makes sense to me! How important can trip be that you, mum, the three month old baby sans helmet or any sense of self preservation for your yourself or child have to ride a motor bike like a lunatic thru the traffic? Or, how can a nation so proud that it flys the national flag at any and all places/occasions then turnaround thoughtlessly dump litter and shit (literally) without even a twinge of guilt?

Then in oz for a reality check to the other extreme. What kind of over over regulated place is this!

Baggage Handling allowance 30kg, we have 31Kg..1 am in the morning, "Sorry sir, you have to unload 1 KG from your bag because our baggage handlers can't lift it"...WTF, Who are you baggage handlers - 6 year old children, bugger me they can lift it in Singapore, Indonesia and all points north!

On the plane, here's your meal and enjoy your "plastic" knife...please what am I the world's worst perpared evil doer? Oz Custom's and Immigration: What do you do Indonesia? Where are you staying? Why did you come? etc etc... Answer "listen up sunshine its 3 in the morning and I am F...ed if I am going to justify to some overweight twit, why I want to return to the country of my birth" (ok that was a bad answer, as apparently that triggers the lets search everything bell..bastards)

On the road (aka Indonesian Motor bike comparsion). Look at the babies here, back seat, roped down with industrial strength cargo nets and speed camera's every 2 km (all in the name of road safety..pig's arse..revenue raising)

As for smoking...damn...its the orginal "burning at the stake" Actually not quite, because passive smoking of burning human flesh will apparently cause cancer in people several oceans away. They still tie you to the stake but in place of the burning, various tax payer funded green groups force you to snort tofu and soy bean milk, listening to the chant the "Koyto Good - America Bad" until your head bursts.

So all in all, I guess I am saying its nice to be back warts n all.

NUCLEAR FACE OFF

The concept of “Face” is an incredibly difficult and dangerous concept particularly when it is Nuclear Powered!

I say face because that can be the only reason that the “powers that be” would even consider a Nuclear Power Plant in Indonesia. Does anyone with even one last firing synapse believe that Nuclear Power Plant could be built and operated safely in the current conditions in Indonesia?

Indonesia has been beset by an on-going list on natural disasters whose most inglorious claim to fame is rather than being mitigated by human invention, the suffering is magnified by powers of 10 by a combination of greed, corruption and a sheer lack of concern for others. Not content with natural disasters, we have decided that we can do so much better than Nature and create the conditions for a disaster that will ensure suffering for thousands of years by building a Nuclear Power Plant in one of the worlds most geographically unstable regions. But hey there are some big bucks to be made!

Why should we be concerned you ask? We assured that Safety protocols will be investigated later.

Well that’s a relief; perhaps we could use the agencies that are responsible for quality and standards on:

Railways…ooops maybe not
Shipping and Ferry’s …oops maybe not
Airlines…..Sorry
Toll roads…nope

I am more than willing to be corrected, to which agency would you be willing to trust the health of the next five generations of your family? As for the rest of South East Asia are you willing to trust country that renders your air unbreathable year after year due rampant burning off of World Heritage Forest for the sake of the rich few?

Besides the above it is economically stupid. Indonesia sits on the world’s largest coal reserves and year after year ships millions of tones of coal to provide power and lighting to other countries. Meanwhile over 40% of her citizens sit in darkness.

How hard would it be to invest some of the billions of Nuclear dollars into Clean Coal Technology and the welfare of her own people? Just the stopping of the wide spread practice of “transfer pricing” would pay for the coal required for the foreseeable future.

It will be interesting if the now discredited environmental group WALHI can make a difference and serve the environment as it is supposed to instead on some bizarre political/personal agenda.

Anyway, I am off to check out the wind patterns to see in which 20,000 sq km area is out of bounds for the next 5000 years.
By the way, I am actually a supporter of Nuclear Power as clean, robust answer to the earths future energy needs. However a couple of fairly basic considerations are required:

a. A robust system of checks and balances
b. A safety regime that is not subject to money politics
c. A stable Geographic Location
d. The ability to assess the above.

In the meantime, before we start thinking about a Nuclear Power Plant, we concentrate on:

Planes that stay in the air
Ferries that don’t sink monthly
Toll roads that don’t collapse after six weeks
Capitial cities that don’t flood every year

Sorry if some find this a bit brutal…But a Nuclear Power Plant…ARE YOU SERIOUS?

GREEN WANK

There is saying from a movie ‘Build it and they will come” and more realistic twist would be “Green it and the Scam will come” Indonesia has it own versions, the more ominous and far reaching being the now strangely silent Newmont pollution trial which Unspun covers here

(Where have all those accusers gone..Still they will be back on the other side when the lawsuits start).

In a worrying trend, Australia seems to leading the way in gold medal for “Green Stupids”. The latest "green wank" may well not be a scam, but it is certainly a stupid way to be parted from your money and a sleazy way to make some. Essentially a company is selling you carbon credits that will off set your carbon foot print on the planet. Or as it was reported the company “vows to spend the $8 you give them on products, such as energy-saving lightbulbs and water-saving shower heads, that reduce emissions elsewhere (if not in your own backyard)”.

Now obviously the you can spend more than $8 on carbon credits with the company (as I sure they would want you too) like one sad soul “For $20, the company made Jenny XXXX into a "carbon-neutral granny" last year. Her daughter, Emily, gave her a gift certificate to offset two years' worth of flatulence. "I don't like to brag, but I actually don't have much flatulence," Mrs XXXX says. "But when I do, I feel OK about it, because the damage to the planet has been offset."…. or “Take Sally XXX and her husband, Stephen XXXX, of Sydney's northern beaches. They have a four-wheel drive, two children - George, 3, and Olivia, 1, both of whom wear disposable nappies - and take three interstate trips a year.

Easy Being Green used a complicated mathematical formula (I bet they did) to value the family's "footprint" at $600 a year, so Mr XXXX bought $600 worth of carbon credits for his wife for her birthday.”
Pleaasee… The amazing thing is not that these people bought this stuff but they actually made any money in the first place. Seriously, you have a lazy six hundred dollars and best thing thing you can think of to improve the planet is an Anti Granny Fart Tax Certificate.

The Chief Executive commenting on a “Simliar money for Green” scheme that generated millions of dollars, mostly from tax payer was cancelled by the government when it proved unworkable (surprise) said "Well, not to rort, but it obviously had its problems."..yea right!

Still the old adges seem to apply – A fool and his money…….

Still if anyone has $600 they want to spend contact me and I will install some light bulbs and even plant a tree for you or buy you a cork for granny’s bum. Oh, I also have some left Y2k recovery plans left over going cheap.

P.S ..Anyone want to bet the CE of the company owns more than one car?

WE HATE BUSH

Along with the plethora of Starbucks across the world, the other parallel trend is the rise in “Anti-America/Bush/USA-ism”. Of course, in Indonesia as in so many other places, your resident “rent a crowd” doffs the placards, the fake blood, complete in the US inspired uniform of jeans, t shirts and base ball cap (guys, the pointy pit goes to the front, its not really that hard) much to the amusement of many.

The Republicans in particular are reviled by many in Indonesia. Although sadly in a lot of cases, the Protestors would be hard pressed to tell you what party Bush represented. To be fair, it’s unreasonable to expect any deep thought process from a mob.

Ironically, a Democrat President with a Democrat controlled congress would be a disaster in real terms for Indonesia. Democrats are traditionally far more interested in human rights abuses (perceived or otherwise) than the Republicans. ..Hello Papua..Munir, East Timor ..How’s that coming along Indonesia? Democrats also place far more emphasis on domestic trade protection, guess where that will be felt.

Of course, the more isolationist foreign policies of the Democrats and need to fund domestic welfare programs will severely restrict foreign aid programs in countries viewed as less than critical in the new order (aka Indonesia). But hey we hate bush, so it’s all going to be good.

So is it to be principles or practical for Indonesia??

I must admit I did kind of like a recent article by Janet Albrechtsen which said in part:

“Anti-Americanism has morphed into a desire to bring America to heel, something that coincides with the goal of Islamists. But if the big, fast rich guy retreats, it’s worth asking who will step up to the plate when the West needs things fixed. The dawdling burghers of Europe may recall that small and slow did not help the Kuwaitis, Bosnian Muslims, Kosovars, Afghanis or the tsunami victims.”
‘So the Islamic world will complain the US is anti-Muslim while overlooking Bosnia. Europeans regularly overlook the fact that American power, resolve and, yes, idealism, delivered them from both Nazism and communism. Nor, when they nip down to the corner store for some foie gras in their BMWs or Citroens, do they remember the contribution the Marshall Plan made to their postwar prosperity.”

Disclosure time. Personally I dislike Bush as well; trouble is I dislike the vast majority of leaders (?) who dislike America more. I think dear ol Janet is probably a bit over the top in defence of America but the point is well made.

Honour..what honour!

"Rape of Pakistani girl leads to protest
Bruce Loudon, South Asia correspondent
February 02, 2007

IN a savage repeat of the Mukhtar Mai case that ignited international outrage, a 16-year-old Pakistani girl was reported last night to have been kidnapped and pack-raped by 11 men, then paraded naked through her village near the town of Ubaro, 530km from the port city of Karachi.
The teenager is believed to have suffered horrifying injuries during the brutal and sustained attack, described as an "honour revenge" after her cousin eloped with the female relative of one of the men accused in the case.
Adding to her agony, police initially expressed scepticism that there had been any sexual assault, refusing to take action, adopting the same attitude they did in the Mukhtar Mai case.

Women are often used in Pakistan's backward rural areas as a means of settling tribal vendettas and so-called matters of "honour". What is clear from last night's reports is that despite the reform of the country's rape laws - forced through parliament by President Pervez Musharraf in the face of trenchant opposition from Islamic fundamentalists - dreadful outrages continue."

I wonder if this will come up in the next round of talks between the Presidents..

It really is a matter of how low can you go..scum!

April Fools

After months of feeling a bit "crook" finally found out whats wrong. Although still not sure why it did not show up on the first blood test a month ago or why it always takes 3 hours to get a blood test done in Indonesia. Anyway it would appear I have picked up a stomach bug which gives rise to on-going fevers and saps any remaining energy and rational thought you may have. Still feverish, so enjoy the following fever induced rant,

Yesterday was the first day, they let me out of hospital and lo and behold its the 1st of April, I had no idea I was out that long!! The Jakarta Post was just full on, with one story after another each topping the other for best April Fool's Joke.

The Agriculture Minister Anton Apriyanto is quoted as saying the nation's commercial poultry breeders were "more well informed about bird flu than back yard farmers and more prepared to deal with the disease and most commercial concerns have implemented proper bio-security measures, successfully combatting bird flu in commercial poultry"

That's a hoot, anyone who has the misfortune to visit the majority of commercial poultry concerns in Indonesia would see the filth and generations of fowl shit raising meters from the floor. Even on the best of days, most Indonesian chickens look at best half starved, racid excuses for poultry. One for the journos..Did not one of you want ask about the well known state of these "concerns"? Or why Singapore banned poultry products from Indonesia a full 12 months before the first ever warning about bird flu in Indonesia?

The Chief Editor of the Jakarta Post learnt (relearnt) the old adage "never share the stage with animals or small children". At a panel discussion regarding the role of Indonesia as a non-permanent member of the United Nations Security Council, the chief editor said " Indonesia needed to be both pragmatic and idealistic in its decisions with the UNSC or risk falling into a double standard of behaviour" sensible words indeed! Trouble was, he was follwed up by Government Minister (?) Djoko Susilo with "for instance, it should be made clear why Indonesia decided to abstain on the Myanmar resolution whilst we uphold democratic and human right values"... Hard to act to follow...although I must be thick coz it still ain't clear to me.


The absolute gold star gem of April Fool's articles was the report that the Jakarta Health Agency was revising a draft law to punish those who refuse to take part an active part in efforts to curb commincable diseases. "For example if we find, during a door to door inspection, find mosquito lavae in a water container, we will give the resident a santion" said Agency Head Salimar Salim. It is said the administration has mulled sending offenders to jail for six months or leving a fine of Rp 50 million ($5488).

Yea..right..Right law..wrong target. How about sending to jail for six months those useless bastards, who despite forever granting themselves allowances, are quite happy for the residents to live next to non-flowing, stinking black cesspits that Jakaratans have to call rivers. Or the kilometers of open sewage drains, or the dodgy developments that increase Jakarta's flooding year in year out..
The poor guy in the kampung, with his bowl of water is the evil one..I think not.. Next thing you know he will get the blame for creating the bird flu crisis..Oops sorry already done that..

As Unspun says..where are the real journalists and media? Who will ask the questions that will reveal these people as the year long April Fool's Joke they are?

One last point, thanks to all for looking after my Troll while I have been away. I know he is immature, not very bright, abusive and somewhat boring after awhile. However it pays to remind us that even evolution forks off into a dead end from time to time. We should all take care that if we wade in the shallow end of the gene pool always wear protection.