Cannibals

Recently some inane, third-rate news (?) current affairs programn in Australia sent reporters to Papua to search for Cannibals (on tourist visas as well, but thats another story).

Well I don't know about deepest darkest Papua but its happening right here in my home (see photo). Of course this is just one of the smaller thugs, his big brother hangs out in my shower recess, which explains the somewhat unsettling sight of me showering in the front yard under the hose (He scares me, its like showering with a Komodo). This front yard showering gave rise to the common term "Bule Gila Masuk Kampung" (Crazy white fella enters the village).

On a related issue, I am busy fighting a rear guard action to protect a 1 meter Montier Lizard (Ralf) who has taken up residence in the drain at the front of the house. Virtually every day, someone is trying to beat it with sticks and or stone it to death (itu gigit mister..that will bite you mister). All commonsense pleas that he will reduce the rats and mice that plaque the streets (not to mention snakes) seem to fall on deaf ears although Ralf has figured out he is safe in our yard, so maybe there is some hope yet.

Class -- you have it or you don't

"Damn, I hate it when I lose invitations"

Just finished reading an cool article on the recent marriage of Danny and Lulu (Danny's Grand Father being none other than the "too ill too attend court" former President Suharto). The wedding soon put paid to those detractors who say the Cendana Family has lost the common touch.

What a wedding party it must have been as well, no subtle, under done bash for this family. According to "Tempo" they even had souvenir roses for the guests. Now these were no ordinary roses, with the rose bud being consructed out of five 10,000Rp bills (for the red colour) with leaves constructed out of 20,000Rp notes.

Local celeb Connie Sutedja gushed "I got three" (aint she a sweetheart). Other note worthy (don't confuse note worthy with praise worthy) guests included Minister for Religious Affairs Maftuh Basyuni, with a total guest list of 5000. Other cutesy items included tulips and imported casablanca lilies (whatever they are?). Rumoured cost of the flowers would exceed two billion Rp (seems a bit much).

Never one to scrape in the mist of poverty, the family lashed out with the food getting the Grand Hyatt to provide Salmon and Beef etc..Not sure what presents were presented, I certainly hope one was a book on class vs crass.

and the loons reckon a tree is bad for society

Well thats all from me, I feel the need to vomit and look up the Indonesian word for no-shame (gotta keep those studies going).

BANYAN TREE INFIDELS

One thing about Indonesia is the seemingly endless number of groups jousting to inflict their own twisted vision of virtue upon us. "Persis" or the United Islam Youth hacked to pieces a 100 year old Banyan Tree located near the Harmoni Bus Center in Jakarta. Apparently the infidel tree had the potential to "corrupt religious and moral faith" according to group spokesman Zenal Arfin Abu Dhiya.

As could be imagined a 100 year old Banyan Tree is fairly significant piece of nature and took some time to be ravaged by Zenal and his little helpers, there is no word on where the police were during this time.

The Banyon tree joins other such notables as dutch cartoonists, the pope and centuries old statues in Afghanistan to raise the ire of the hive mind.

However, there is a very strong connection between Zenal and the Banyan Tree one gave the community oxygen all of its life the other stole it.

I am not a big believer in the Earth Mother thing but tonight I might just offer up a pagan prayer for justice. It is often heard that the media protrays Islam in a negative fashion, with groups like Persis around perhaps its time to stop blaming the media and stop the lunatic fringe groups hijacking the name of Islam.

Meanwhile beware the Earth Mother, she can be a mean bitch!!! and if there is a Judgement day is should be interesting when the best thing one can offer up as a life's work is "Well I did hack a tree down that took you 100 years to create"

More India stuff, did I say say lots of people!! The picture was a result of asking the local taxi and asking where is the ATM. This is the view after I alighted from the taxi.

200m to the ATM.. 55mins to get there..It was against the flow..

As I said amazing place......

India and da thang

Hi All, back and I can still confirm if you must fly then the Singapore Girls are still a good way to go as opposed to the Mangy Roo (QANTAS). Our trip involved a dash of Singapore, lashings of India and sprinkling of places in between. Thailand was on the agenda but I kinda like supporting those countries that at least have make the attempt at giving the people a choice in government, so Thailand was skipped. Anyone want to comment on why such muted commentary in Indonesia on the coup?

Unfortunately in all the travels, no sightings of our blogger friend
Friskodude who seems to have fallen off the planet he loves so much.

As one who has been know to give a bit of stick to Indonesian Officialdom from time to time, I have to confess that our local Customs and Immigration guys leave the Indian counterparts choking in their dust. It was actually a pleasure to come back to officials neat and tidy in their uniforms and at least displaying some interest in what they do. Just goes to show (as some people have been telling me, everything is relative).

It was also encouraging to see that India has an active environmental program (pictured, writing on the bus says " World's largest eco friendly CNG bus service) although from the limited time in country it would appear like Indonesia it consists of more words than action. One critical point was in all the major cities visited, air quality was much much cleaner than Jakarta. This is not doubt due to the widespread use of CNG on public transport large and small. India also has far smaller population of those smog spewing, two stroke motor cycles that clog Jakarta’s city streets in the absence of a viable and safe public transport system.

People…what can I say…I have never seen so many people in one place trying to occupy the same square meter of space. All in all a very interesting trip.

While I have been away, I see Da Thang has been spewing forth his anti-western bile again. You would think someone who declares himself a Jakarta-based columnist would have plenty to write about in Jakarta rather than 60 year old stories from Australia and how America treats her pets. He does claim to be a writer (I use the term loosely, writer perhaps, a reseacher not) for hire though, it would be interesting to see who is paying for the stories as the anti-western seems to spew forth everytime the Indonesian Government comes under international pressure for some reason or other.

Thanks to Jakartass for the mention whilst I was away. I was a bit sneaky dropping by for a pop shot and the running away again..grin..I am not yet back full time but hope to resume normal blogging within the next week or so…

BEWARE THE HIVE MIND

Just popping for a few minutes and then be on my way again.

I see the Borg Hive Mind is out on the streets again. It’s a shame the hive mind can’t ever do something constructive like perhaps protest the destruction of the Indonesian villages by the “Brothers Grim” or perhaps even get off their collective arses and help repair the majority of the schools that are falling down around the students ears. Is there any doubt the hive mind has lost its claim to belong to humanity (if it ever did).

Meanwhile, some our other blogging friends seem to be having a great time on the organic fermented fruit juice with a decidedly right angled green bend to recent posts. Indcoup even went so far as praising the Australian Greens for heavens sake. If there is a Cosmic All Powerful Body then he will surely save us from the likes of Australian Greens Polly Bob Brown and his team of looney tunes.

Elsewhere, a number of companies are coping a “caning” for attending a Corporate Social Responsibility (CSR) lecture/seminar (this would be a good thing wouldn’t it??)… I am a big believer in companies taking responsibility for their actions (although the CSR strikes me as a politically correct term designed to try and please the rabids) but attacking companies for attending...Oh well…I suddenly feel the need for a tin foil hat.

Ok here’s the thing!!! Governments don’t make money they just spend it!!! The socialism experiment failed and millions died.

Not all industries are the children of Satan. In a country where personal Income Tax is concept standing right along side the tooth fairy. Corporate taxes and royalties provides what pathetic infrastructure there is. The governments job is to ensure the money is spent wisely mmmmm… Perhaps the term we should be looking at is GSR.

Anyway, that all I have time for----Seeya! and beware the Hive-mind it can lower your IQ in an instant.

BTW… I do think companies should act responsibly and personally I am astounded that the mud men are not in jail with their assets seized... Exploiting resources is not always a negative thing (in fact rarely) unless you want to take civilization back a thousand years.

mud monsters and bloggers

Still travelling so no decent posts yet for awhile...However keeping an eye on the news.

One has to ask what's wrong with a place jails someone for a joke about a political figure (supporters of censorship rejoice) but provides cover for people who smother whole villages in toxic mud...

Meanwhile Jakartass has fired up a discussion with his comments on the Mud Monsters or should that be pond scum.

Me?? I cannot help think how different the government reaction would be if it was an Foreign company...or am I just a cynic...

AIRLINE SECURITY

Well its been a hetic few days and I think I have managed to annoy most people, so I guess it has not been a total loss. All good things come to an end and I must take a short plane trip for a few days. Back early next week so no blogging until then.

Of course, the new security plans (see picture) at our local airport has made this SO MUCH MORE INTERESTING...and that Asia Air policy of not being able to book seats ensures the running start is a must.

Have a good weekend...and someone feed the trolls please

an open letter

It seems I have once again trodden where "angels fear to tread" with yesterdays post BLOGG OFF. I would have thought more comments would be forthcoming on the Genocide in Sudan than the relatively inconsequential "whingers of us bloggers". An interesting social commentary on us all perhaps.

I for one acknowledge that my postings are or can be on the negative side, but most often that is borne of frustration. What frustration you ask? The glaring fact that no one seems to care or give a damn!!..Naturally the more frustration you feel the more cynical you become.

Todays Examples Alone... Ravaged rain forests and buring off with the smoke and haze effecting not only Indonesia but her neighbor's as well. Pictures in the today's paper of riverways that make you want to vomit and cry in disgust ..Thugs and bullies that seem to attract nary a word...etc etc..

And with notable and predictable exceptions ..nothing..nnaada...zip..zero

Please and I am serious here not being rude or insulting (or not trying to be) can someone explain why it is so?

Is it the people really just do not care (I can't believe that)

Is it that people are still scared to comment on those with the power to do something?

A general feeling of it won't make a difference anyway?

Don't admit errors at any cost?

Or is it just that culturally we view blogs and open comment differently?


I hope no one takes offence at the above (actaully thats not really true but I hope some take offence for the right reasons). I also hope someone can enlighten me.. I really do not understand where is the outrage? Where is the passion for the things that really effect our lives that is so evident in those things that have no effect (dare I mention playboy)?

thanks

BLOGG OFF

I think it is very sad that the very people who you would think that by natural selection would defend freedom of speech (aka Bloggers), are sometimes the first to call for censorship. I have been reading Indonesian Blogsphere posts calling for accountability (?) of other bloggers (never themselves mind you). Accountability will always be a fairly evil word when applied to the media, blogs or any other form of communication. Any restrictions on free speech rarely remain benign. The problem is and always will be “Who checks the checker”?

Have you ever heard one of these censor advocates say "That work had better be banned because I might read it and it might be very damaging to me?" (Joseph Henry Jackson). The very assumption that people (besides the censors) cannot choose for themselves what to read or see is arrogance at its most oppressive.

Almost invariably, the people calling for “accountability” are not really concerned with the facts or the truth no matter how much that they protest the same. These insecure souls want you to be accountable for dragging them outside of their comfort zone and their cozy (and sometimes perverse) little view of the world.

There is no need for censorship in any place let alone amongst bloggers. One of the major advantages of the blogsphere is a lie or falsehood has a very short half-life . Yes, the hate sites remain but they too are quickly exposed to all but the brain dead as little more than the rantings of lunatics.

I believe the “blog” self regulates to huge degree, particularly in our smaller blog world here in Indonesia. Most of us operate on an “open comments” basis (albeit with moderation enabled to kill the spam and mindless bad language and threats). This alone means any obvious bullsh*t will be exposed in a matter of minutes. A pretty simple rule is, if a blogger won’t let you comment with a different opinion then dump the page, its crap and deserves to be treated as such.

On a personal blog note, I love the “inane” comments that sometimes come along with my posts and others such as “Check your Facts” or “You don’t know what you are talking about” Whilst that is probably true in a lot of cases, the comment on its own without providing an alternative or at least a link to demonstrate the error is a waste of the time it takes to comment (Its also lazy and troll like behaviour).

Blog’s are many things to many people, to some they are an online version of the “The diary of Adrain Mole” complete with minute by minute updates of their loves and losses (I will never understand the attraction but hey). To other people, their blog is an opinionated version of current social/political events. This is the beauty of blogging everyone gets to have a say.

Whatever is blogged doesn’t really matter. Invariably the blog takes on a bias of its own. To call for accountability (??) because someone doesn’t meet your view of what “blog-able” is a sign of an immature and insecure society/person. The fundamental principles of freedom of speech (coming back to the “who checks the checkers “principle again) is far more important than any one person’s feelings or prejudices.

This doesn’t mean you can slander someone or print an untruth in a deliberate attempt to hurt someone. There are already laws against slander in the vast majority of countries in the world, including Indonesia.

In a very short time, we know what we are going to get when we check any blog and as the sign says “enter at your own risk”. For example, If I drop into Jakartass then I will get social commentary with a green bent. Indcoup provides social commentary with a distinctly coarse and cynical edge. IndoMatters will normally manage to raise the ire of some with commentary on the more “out-there” pressure groups and quasi-government follies (he is certainly provided with heaps of material by some loons). Yosef provides succinct and informative information on the Indonesian business and Political world, and of course Greenstump he just mucks about and fills his page with whatever fills his head that day.

So in summary, if you don’t like what is said because you don’t like the perceptions of the facts, the sources or the links or even the bias then I can only suggest in the nicest possible way its time to get a grip or …...”BLOGG OFF”.

P.S. If you are going to accuse someone of lacking credibility, it pays to provide a counter argument otherwise yells of common sense and accountability are just so much white noise.

Lebanon or Sudan - A hard question?

It may be that the situation in the Middle East has settled down a bit for the time being. Of course that leaves a heap of the morally outraged all dressed up with no place to go.

Perhaps they could consider the Sudan, where Muslim Genocide is being carried out on a daily basis. Not as newsworthy as Lebanon for some reason.

"Since 2003, the Sudanese government and the Janjaweed militias burned and destroyed hundreds of rural villages, killed tens of thousands of people and raped and assaulted thousands of women and girls. The government’s campaign forced more than two million Darfurians from their homes. As of 2006, some 1.7 million displaced people live in camps in Darfur and approximately 208,000 people have fled to neighboring Chad, where they live in refugee camps"

Perhaps as the world's largest Muslim nation, Indonesia could do a bit better than these ratbags:

"Arab League has been largely silent on the atrocities in Darfur. This is probably because Sudan is a member of the Arab League and the Sudanese government has close relations with Egypt and other fellow Arab League members. The Arab League did send a fact-finding mission to Darfur in May 2004 but although its report concluded that serious atrocities were taking place, the Arab League has yet to publicly condemn or criticize the massive human rights abuses in Sudan"

Oh by the way "All of the people in Darfur are Muslim " as opposed to about 50% in Lebanon.

For those that wish to know more go to HUMAN RIGHTS WATCH SUDAN.

LATEST NEWS BREAK new human rights crisis in Darfu

Censorship Offends Me!

Censors (the lowest form evolutionary life, along with dog catchers and parking inspectors) and accountability in writing are in the news again and have even found some supporters in Blog World here..(ugh..have you no shame!).

I am working on a post but is taking awhile..in the meantime

"The populist authoritarianism that is the downside of political correctness means that anyone, sometimes it seems like everyone, can proclaim their grief and have it acknowledged. The victim culture, every sufferer grasping for their own Holocaust, ensures that anyone who feels offended can call for moderation, for dilution, and in the end, as is all too often the case, for censorship. And censorship, that by-product of fear - stemming as it does not from some positive agenda, but from the desire to escape our own terrors and superstitions by imposing them on others - must surely be resisted. ~Jonathon Green, "Did You Say 'Offensive?'," as posted on wordwizard.com

Lies exposed

Recently Jakartass ran some rather pathetic attempts with "Photoshop". It would appear that certain parties have given that up altogether and just plain lie in order to get the propaganda across. The top photo is as published by Defence Industry Daily - of its sinking of the decommissioned Australian destroyer-escort HMAS Torrens off the coast of Western Australia in 1998.

The bottom photo is from http://www.moqavemat.com - "an Iran-based website run by the Hezbollah terrorist group - is running this picture (above) of what it claims is the Israeli ship it hit with a missile last month" (Andrew Bolt. )



Had a quick read of the web site as well, All I can say is I wish the Italians lots and lots of luck.

Now before the run of usual.."others do it too" comments. I don't care! Expose them as well and maybe one day there may exist some truth and balance in reporting. The more light Bloggers and ordinary people shine in dark places, the harder it is for the cockroaches and liars to hide.

Borders and BullSh#t

Feeling a bit tired today so just a cartoon to keep the expat xenophobes amused and a link to the latest on
Border Security and Refugees in Australia (even manage to get a bit of eco global warming as well).

Hostile Acts

It’s been a busy week for some Indonesian Government Ministers, with Independence Day and proposing? planning? sending (that won't happen) an Indonesian Peace Keeping (?) Force to the Middle East. Now as an interesting aside, they are also planning to send 42 tanks, but they have to buy them first and ship them straight to Lebanon.

This in itself raises some questions and thoughts on the logic (or absence thereof) applied by some of these people. More of concern is it shows just how beholden the current government is to the more extreme groups in Indonesia.

A couple of quick thoughts anyway...

What use would 42 tanks be? Only one of the combatants has tanks and 42 tanks ain't gunna worry them anyway.

Its common knowledge that to be even semi proficient as a tank crewman you need at least 12 months training, so where and when would the training take place?

Which broker gets the deal? (ok this one is just a bit cynical)

On the same topic Indonesian Defense Minister, Juwono Sudarsono said Friday "that the government had allocated Rp 374 billion (US$41.09 million) to finance some 1,000 troops to join peacekeeping forces in Lebanon."

Now let’s look at this in context. Indonesia does not recognise Israel as a nation, has no diplomatic relations with Israel, as taken a decidedly weak kneed approach to the jihadis (?) planning to travel to the Middle East (to attack who??..sorry trick question) and besides sorely needing the funds at home believes it would be able to act and be respected as a neutral party.... Give us break!!
For a more detailed and cynical view of the plan, pop across to Indonesia Matters

Let’s reverse the situation. How would Indonesia feel/react if Israeli (commonly called the Zionist state) personnel were sent to Aceh to monitor the situation there??.. Can anyone think where $41. million dollars might be spent... perhaps here

Meanwhile, Djoko Susilo, member of House of Representatives Commission I overseeing security and international affairs declared Prime Minister of Australia had hostile intentions towards Indonesia after withdrawing withdrawal a proposed new immigration law in the country.

Djoko from the National Mandate Party was quoted by the Jakarta Post as saying "The withdrawal reflects hostile intentions. Howard was not serious from the beginning. The initiative was taken only to trick the Indonesian government so that it would send back its ambassador to Canberra, and Howard could meet President Susilo Bambang Yudhoyono in Batam" he went on to say "it is incomprehensible that Howard could withdraw the legislation although his party held a majority of seats in the Australian parliament and senate"

It fact it is not incomprehensible at all. It’s called democracy at work! It was a particularly nasty piece of legislation which would have further prevented refugees from accessing legal processes in Australia and worse doomed them to long stays on difficult to monitor "off shore" facilities.

The legislation did not "sit well" with the Australian people and more than one government "back bencher" knew his seat was at risk if he didn't LISTEN to the people. It was pleasing to see that in a least in some cases, ETHICS rather than party politics won the day and banished this piece of appeasement to the dustbin where it belongs.

Djoko (a renown hater of all things OZ) by his statement demonstrated a complete lack of understanding of the democratic process in Australia (not a good situation for someone sitting on the Commission I overseeing security and international affairs) or....

Seriously, the Indonesian People deserve better than this from their elected representatives (?). Perhaps then instead of blaming others, the real issue of why there are so many Asylum seekers from Indonesia could be addressed.

As for the assertion that the withdrawal of the legislation was "Only to trick the Indonesian government so that it would send back its ambassador to Canberra"

I have some bad news ..no one noticed he was gone!

Independence Day

Happy Independence Day.. 17 August is Indonesian Independence Day although like at lot of other countries there is some dispute about if the 17th is actually technically correct. Not that it really matters as like all independence days it is more symbolic than anything else. Symbolic of what??

Perhaps, the hopes and dreams of the common people after years (centuries) and domination of oppression by external and domestic tyrants, the ability to worship in peace, a right to education, freedom from fear, the ability to support and raise a family. A time to look back and see what has been achieved and what has not.
Perhaps time to reflect on the underbelly as well as the surface gloss..

.... THEN AGAIN PERHAPS JUST AN EXCUSE FOR A REST AND A PARTY

Essentially, Indonesia shuts down until after the weekend, with any number of parties and celebrations all heavily laced with a healthy dose (perhaps unhealthy?)Dose of Nationalism.

One of the more interesting features of the day is the traditional granting of remissions to the resident jailbirds around the country.

The year is no exception...SCHAPELLE Corby has been given two months remission on her 20-year sentence which must have made her feel fantastic until she heard, "At least nine Indonesian convicts jailed for relatively minor (?) roles in the 2002 Bali bombings, which killed 202 people including 88 Australians, will have four months cut from their jail terms"

Would have loved to have been a fly on the wall when they decided the relative merits of those two cases.

Personally I can't see how you can have a "minor role" when 202 people have been slaughtered by rabid and extremely poor excuses for human beings

However, Happy day all, we all do "live in interesting times"

Who knows maybe we can all have a collective rush of blood and the freedoms and rights of ALL will blossom in the year to come.

Porky pies and my mate bill

Fairly busy of late, with many interesting things happening which I shall go into later..in the meantime.. Cartoonist Bill Leak has been "annoying the annoyed" again.

I agree with many of my critics than it is only a very small portion of nutters that give a country a bad name. However, thats what happens, lets be honest one far right politician (Hanson)convinced nearly everyone that All Australians were racists. Point being is what do the people do about it, pretend it isn't there or..

Speaking of pork products (or not as the case may be)..Who would want to tell this old boar that his whole genus is unclean...

Isn't there enough already

"INDONESIAN protests against the Israeli offensive in Lebanon grew at the weekend, with one of the main organisers, Muslim political agitator Suaib Didu, declaring a deadline of Tuesday for hostilities to cease "or I will no longer bear responsibilities for the jihad activities that follow"."

"He repeated that claim after Saturday's ceremony, adding that if John Howard did not quickly condemn Israel's military actions against Hezbollah, "we have operatives in place who can assassinate him".

loaded words?.


Sigh..

MYOB

Reading the Jakarta Post today and besides a few laughs in the letters section, I came across, I think the call it a "factiod".

Apparently the US used to produce a coin with "MIND YOUR (OWN) Business embossed on it. What a great motto!!!

Perhaps Indonesia could print it on all of its currency (bit late for the US now). Maybe the next time the thugs, no-hopers, sanctimonious busy bodies and bullies stop off for a "botol teh" on the way to their latest act of intimidation, they might heed the advice.



Sound advice indeed..chill and have some tea!

EXPATS AND THE BLACK DOG

As all regular readers of the Indonesian Blogsphere will know expats have been the topic of the week so to speak, so I will continue the trend.

Some of the more prevailing (incorrect) perceptions radiating from some of the posts and comments was the Expat lifestyle was one great party that of consisted of booze, birds and bucks. As usual, a fair bit of envy provided a unpleasant undertone in number of comments, but that is to be expected. The grass is always greener!!

Indcoup touched on a another Expat suicide the other day. This is another uglier/sadder side to consider in one of your more compassionate moments. As Indcoup’s post indicates, far from being a life of endless fun and frivolity, the expatriate life can also be one of intense loneliness, incredibly long hours and intense periods of homesickness. This applies to Indonesian expats as well as your standard variety or as Treespotter would say “bule” version.

However, for the sake of a reference point I shall restrict this point to us ‘bule”. The point is often brought up why are you here? Well for most it’s easy, a combination of the following:

1. Money;
2. Adventure;
3. Challenge;
4. Personal or Professional Crisis at home;
5. Normal Career Progression.

Now the bias attached to any one point is dependent on the person involved but it will nearly always be a mixture of the above.

The new expat will arrive bright eyed and bushy tailed, gazing with wonder at everything new that assaults him immediately upon arrival. Soon however, (unless he is lucky enough to work for one of those generous (?) companies that allow whole families to be uplifted) He finds him (her) self looking for someone to talk to as the loneliness begins to set in.

If he is the only expat in his company this will be interesting and at the same time further depressing. Whilst most of the local staff may speak English of sorts, rarely is it nuanced enough for that inimate conversation he so desires and needs. With his own Bahasa barely above ordering a taxi level, he will seek out the others of his kind in similar situation.

Now comes the most dangerous time for our newbie, the older hands are normally safely tucked away with wives (national or expat) and support networks that have taken sometimes years to build up. Our newbie invariably ventures out and gravitates towards the kinds of places that cater for the lonely guy with time and money on their hands. Contrary to the popular (PC driven twaddle) he is not the hunter but the hunted, like a lame wilderbeast that has wandered from the herd, easy prey for the streetwise and cunning.

If he is lucky and does have a semblance of a support network back home or elsewhere this may just be a phase and he may yet adjust and move on. If not, he may well find himself back at the same place very other night, seeking solace in the bottle and the pretty faces that smile but little else. Both the bottle and the pretty but shallow face (that smile is just her means of getting through the day as well), provide only a temporary, fleeting patch on the loneliness which is now gnawing at his gut.

As time goes buy, he will find a way to feed all of his physical needs. The more he does so, the more his soul will crave that companionship all humans need to grow but is so hard to find. This is the time when that “black dog of depression” can really get his teeth into him.

It’s a testament to the human condition the vast majority of expats manage to progress through these times and nearly all find their place in their new society. A few don’t and some seem to even relish and thrive on the superficial (although none of us are around when the black dog comes calling on them in wee hours).

Whilst the post is about the expat in all of us, I can say the Indonesian Expat if anything feels it even more acutely due to his/her strong family ties.

The partners of these expats, well to that’s another post..perhaps not from me

A few pointers for the new expat (my opinion only)

1. If your relationship at home has fractures, here it will shatter.
2. If you get involved with a local girl, you are involved with her family.
3. Security may be the compound but its not living in Indonesia.
4. Join a club, play golf..anything ..you have to make the time.
5. What you think you said, what they think you said and what was actually said never ever met.
6. Beware the black dog he is always waiting to feed.

So next time you see one of those "hell raising, over paid, expats" and you go home to your loving wife, family and place of comfort. Perhaps you may wish to consider that the grass is not always greener.

Indonesian cool stuff

Treespotter certainly fired things up with his post on expats. I have almost bailed on that one as it seemed to be getting very personal and nasty. I was also having a lot trouble following the comment thread (although I do wonder who is the lemony guy? Is that me?.)

So today to put some personal myths to rest, I thought I would jot down some notes on what amazes me, intrigues me, astounds me (all those things that makes me love Indonesia) about Indonesia. I should qaulify that some of the items in the following list can induce a real love/hate thing depending on how your day is going:

Traffic..
Its bizarre, no matter what happens, how busy it is, the traffic is like a river finding its own level, it just somehow keeps moving along. Motor bikes will keep flowing around obsticles, trees, broken buses, footpathes etc. The tolerance displayed is amazing. If we tried jumping the line at home as is the done thing here, there would be gunfights and punch ups every 20 meters of the toll road.

Schoolkids...
No matter what the circumstances of the parents, it always seems that the kids are in uniform (normally white as well) neat, tidy and well presented. Don't see much of F U tshirts... studs thru the lip crap here.

Family
For a westerner, it is simply amazing how the ties are kept and how far they reach. I remain an object of curiosity (pity) simply because I have not seen my sister for ten years. Babysitting here is NEVER a problem always someone around.

Religion..
Ok, I will tread carefully (today only). I have met one Islamic Girl who simply amazed me (I am sure there are others) she not only "talked the talk, but walked the talk" Literally could not touch her (not a relative) but she never had a mean word about anyone (of any faith or failing). Most impressive to me was her complete and utter belief in her faith. I must admit I envied her peace, contentment and strength of conviction (it would never work for me, I am way to cynical). At the same time she represented to me the positive side of Islam as opposed to the ....

Environment.. (under severe threat)
Tigers, Apes, Jungle, Volcanos, some of the best diving in the world...amazing but disappearing.

The Street Venders..
These guys and women are the best. I can sit outside my house. The "Jamu" lady will come with a boxes of drinks (don't look at it)on her back. Drinks and potions that can make me "strong" hard????(true), skinny, fat, grow my hair (I ain't bald) etc etc..Five minutes later, the Vegitable guy comes on his motor bike and about 50% of the stuff he sells, I have no idea what it is! Or stranger yet, the vender outside the nightclub selling Viagra (?) Condoms (?) or would you believe it.... a Tie?

The Bar..
Beer is cheap, service is wonderful and you never ever open your own stubbie (bottle). A never ending passing parade of pretty girls, strange expats all who have a story, Indonesian guys who vary from the hardened regular to the eyes agoog "this is what expats do all day" type. I should add this drinking reputation can be unfortunate as the vast marjority of expats don't spend every dime drinking, most have families, loves and lifes like everyone else.

The Airlines... (QANTAS YOU SUCK)
Scary, fun, unpredictable but happy all QANTAS/BA staff should take lessons. Catch any plane with a "FLY IS CHEAP" logo and you know it will be an adventure.

The Women
Exotic, friendly, industrious, caring and slightly mystic (make that very mystic, more than one unsuspecting chap has lost his way). You have heard of the House of the Rising Sun,well every bar is like that here.

The Traditions (also under threat)
You could travel this country, for your whole life and you would still only see just the surface ripples.

The Summary
To finish off, what I love most about Indonesia is its "rawness" . Australia and its ilk for all their crys of freedom and democracy are over regulated, over taxed, "nanny states" with blind, overbearing buearcrats infesting and sucking the blood out the populace like a bad case of gut worms. Not happy with giving up smoking themselves then "do-gooders" in their never ending search for relvance resort to ensuring no one else can have a puff. You want to have kids out of wedlock, fill ya boots the state (read taxpayer) will pay for them. Insult me and I sue you, punch me and the police will arrest you. Live in so much imagined fear that the airlines won't even give you a butter knife....sad sad places these days.

Now in Indonesia, the government has very little impact on the ordinary guy in the street, it exists only for a chosen few. The rest live, breath and reproduce on their own wits and cunning. Have a problem..calling the Police, Lawyer, Legal Aid is not an option, they sort things out the traditional way. You break in my house, I will deal with it personally. Have traffic issue and abuse the other driver better be prepared to back it up because the police won't come and save your arse when it gets out of control .

Yes, it is still man's world here. PC is virtually unheard of. The kind of world you make for your family here depends on the kind of man you are, its not goverment regulated its up to you....

And I may ask what the hell is wrong with that???..absolutely nothing in my book!!

Am I going to keep at those things that do give me the Sh@ts here ..you betcha

ELECTIONS ARE ON!

Woo Hoo, its on!!! The Best Indonesian Blog elections and the stump has been nominated! Although I am bit nervous about nominated under what "incoherant rants in general" perhaps.

Anyway its on, and you can vote here. Do vote, it should be fun! I have already voted and modesty prevents me from saying how (although if the stump only gets one first place vote the jig is up).

I did vote "fair n square" well sorta... ok not at all..happy now!

I was going to do thing normal thing to gain votes and hand out t shirts but that sneaky Indcoup has that covered with his T Lestri tshirt. I might see if there are any green t shirts left over from the last national elections.

Other than the tshirts, I might have to get into gutter politics and start rumours about the various unsavory sexual habits of my fellow bloggers involving baby oil, wet suits and masking tape (nothing like a sex scandal to heat up the vote, just ask the brits).

Treespotter has already started with magnificent
spleen spurt on expat bloggers and expats in general. Jakartass. has ruled himself out as he is some sort of blogshere KPU (Election Arrangers) and we all know what happened to them. Just kidding!! Actually with him gone makes it easier for the rest of us.

On other matters, Parinduri has taken me to task for being overly negative (I think so has Treespotter but hard to tell, too much bile today). It is a fair point but in my own pathetic defence, its easier to be cynical than upbeat when writing (for me anyway).

In an effort to make up, please go and read this article, it really is a beautiful piece on the special "little people" that make Indonesia a great place to live.

A sample;

" feel more respect and appreciation for "little people" like Pak Abai, because they usually have more skills and often more integrity, and because the quality of my life is greatly enhanced by them. Now that's something I couldn't say for most politicians and entrepreneurs.

All I can say is hear hear!!

LATEST... I been challenged (with some venom) to write what I like/love about Indonesia..accepted..it will be kinda soppy tho ..I suppose its good thing to show your soft side during election kinda like kissing shit machines (oops I meant like kissing babies..dang this being nice and uncynical(?)is going to be tough)!

Evil Zionists and Sneaky Arabs

It might be the emotion of the times, but the recent most crisis in the Middle East has predictably got people fired up across the world.

Indonesia brought up on a fairly obscenely biased pro Palestine diet has given the Media its head and it is off and running in the "evil Zionist mode". Meanwhile, the majority of the US press is running with the "sneaky Arabs" (Syria, Iran..You know the usual suspects) and the European press is....Does anyone know what they stand for at any time (lets exclude the Guardian, fairly sure they are only a source of cheap filler articles for the Jakarta Post)?

Interestingly Al Jazeera came out with probably the most balanced reporting so far. A couple of the more interesting quotes from the Al Jazeera article include:

"accused Hezbollah of "cowardly blending" among Lebanese civilians and causing the deaths of hundreds during two weeks of cross-border violence with Israel"

"Israel's offensive "disproportionate" and "a violation of international humanitarian law."

Probably about right, pretty hard to have anything but contempt across the board with both these mobs.

I have also come under attack for having issues about Islam although I have not been able to pin down the actual root cause of complaint. Personally I don't think I do have issues with Islam.

I do have issues with mindless thugs who cower behind the shroud of religion such as the so called Islamic (???) cleric who wanted to
kill 1000 innocent bystanders to "please Allah" or....

Our very own Islamic Defenders Front (this would give you a great belly laugh if it wasn't so sad and hypercritical), the FPI (with defenders like these who needs enemies) reported the Indonesian Miss Universe contestant to the Police stating "We are reporting her and several others involved in her participation in the Miss Universe pageant, for intentionally and openly engaging in indecency,"

Now ok that's a bit extreme and more that bit intolerant but the next quote from the mob who has harassed people, stormed and ransacked various places of public (and I might add legal) entertainment, rocked and damaged various embassies, trashed magazine offices, etc etc etc is stunning in its unmitigated gall!

"We, at the FPI, are concerned. If the law is not respected, what will happen to the country?" the lawyer said.

Time the FPI came up with a new name the current one just does not do these people (?)justice and their acts justice.

At least the complete lunacy made the Taipei Times and the Washington Post so the FPI is really doing the country proud.

Oh and speaking of western media bias and paranoia, and do cast your mind back to "those" cartoons check this out.

Indonesian & Korean Day Dreams

Tired of reading, talking, writing about the one sided bias of the ME issues of the past few days. What better plan than to visit Friskodude, a sort of travel blog with attitude and check where I should be going for a holiday (Yes I still need one...bad!!).

Ramadhan is fast approaching and as they say "if you can't stand the heat get out of the kitchen".

Anyway, casting around (lurking with intent), I followed a link from the Friscodude's site's to check out some new cars at Max Watsons blog Certainly a pleasant lunch hour spend looking at ..mmm new cars. Enjoy and have a great friday!

WARNING: If you are FPI, Anti Playboy, believe women should be kept in sacks then you will most certainly be offended (actually we know you will go and look, ya dirty little pervs, who are we kidding).

Women with small children, its ok safe for well adjusted, sane, moral human beings to see!!

Testing Times

Time for a quick test.


Question One: Which one is subjected to Police Questioning and general harrassment..? (You can only pick A or B, Any comments about hoards of weapons, helicopters etc will be laughed at but not scored)


A. A government official who has
20 mins warning of a tsunami and doesn't pass the warning on... hundreds die

B. A girl who poses with her clothes on in a seriously fading (in the rest of the world)brand name magazine.

Question 2: You are a sovereign government and you allow rockets to be fired by a unelected militia force from your soil into populated areas of a seriously paraniod, armed to the teeth neighbouring nation , and the kidnap soldiers of the foresaid nation. Do you expect?

a. The nation rocketed to accept all their past wrongs (real and perceived) and beg forgiveness.

b. The International Community come rushing to the aid of a group already declared terrorist.

c. The Nation rocketed to react with massive force as they have always done, making it so much easier for another neighbouring nation to stomp you again as they did in the past

d. Middle East Nations to band together to support you because we are all brothers and until the unnamed nation came it was all peace, light and justice here.

e. You don't give a toss how many or who dies as long as you "maintain the rage"


(Ok I confess, Answer D is a red herring)

As they say "You can pick your friends but you can't pick your family"

GLOBAL WARMING - BAH HUMBUG

Don't Panic!!! There is still time to feed a rabid greenie to a Polar Bear.

Despite what you read and hear to the contrary, of 20 worldwide populations of Polar Bear only 2 have suffered any significant decline in the last 20 years. The other populations are stable and in some cases (shock, horror)
growing.

This is a bit a of a bugger. I just got finished selling all my coats and jackets and now they are telling me that Global Warming
may not be happening after all. This is bizarre, I mean rabid greens have made entire careers out of this "Global Warming thingy". Of course, those rabid greens they are robust lot.

In the seventies and eighties the RG catching sloganed t'shirt was the one that that screamed to all and sundry that a Global Winter was going to kill us all in a matter of weeks (this by the way was all America's Fault). Trouble is the screaming unwashed tshirt and hair band market was soon saturated.

After casting around for a few years with various new products such as No Nuclear Power, Free Rhodesia (that has kinda gone off a bit of late), Pro abortion, Anti Abortion, etc etc, it was obvious that a new global scare product was required ..Enter Global Warming.....

The best part is Global Warming (guess what..This is America's fault too)is hard to prove or disprove therefore this was a real winner! As with any crappy sales campain, its best to keep your remarks and scares vague and general. Unfortunately, it is hard to control your sales zealots when their blood is up.

So when the RG's starting making comments like Polar bears are disappearing (they aint!) or the ice is thinning and all the islands are sinking (actually always had problem with that one, how come only some islands are sinking..hmmm). The product is starting to smell a bit.

Anyway, they have had a good run, but looks like the jig is nearly up and someone may have to admit, "Ok you got us..No one knows what is happening yet, sorry about the dodgy data"..(Don't hold your breath)

I can hardly wait for the next one..Maybe.. "No World Wide Disasters Coming - Rabid Greens Starve"

Oh and still on the environment.. Australia is debating to rename an extinct (or not) parrot. New names touted include the
Messiah Bird (due to its constant resurrection from the dead) or the Tuckshop Parrot (due its habit of turning up where ever there is a new development planned).

Now I should point out their are no pictures of this bird as it is extinct!!! This is an interesting fact. Because the "extinct" little bugger apparently has a QANTAS frequent flyers card having stalled proposed $200 million developments in Queensland and Tasmania (about 5000km apart).

Proof of its non extinction (besides the QANTAS Frequent Flyer Registration)is Queensland Parks and Wildlife Services officer Ian Gynther that he has documented more than 30 of what he describes as "reliable" records.

"There are just too many sightings of the parrot by too many people for them not to be seeing the right thing," Gynther says. "The evidence is irrefutable"

Irrefutable??? Really Ian.. Well that's a weight off my mind.. Also helps on the flying saucer and Roswell thing as well!! Lots more than 30 sightings and they have BLOODY pictures. At least we aren't stretching the boundaries of facts here...

And this is the problem..RB's are becoming so discredited with the general populace that they have lost all credibility. Take note, most of us can recognise a SCAM when they see one. The only loser here is the environment.

Maybe time soon to do a post on those other environmental crocks, The Alternative Energy Scams...In particular Indonesia's flavour of the month bio-fuel and that western crock ..Wind power.

Something in the water

Must be something in the water!! Treespotter is having a
rant(amongst other things) about the Israel, the US and the Palistine problem/issue/crisis. That alone makes him braver than me as I don't think anyone can sort that mess out. I am certainly not one of brigade that thinks its all the JOOWS fault. Not that they help their cause with massive force in return for rocket attacks. I have never understood how Palistine can be so poor when the Middle East is awash with PetroDollars, perhaps they are of more use to some as a "cause"...I dunno..

All I can think of is uproot the UN HQ from New York with all its fat cats and money wasters. Dump the whole shebang in the middle of the disputed terrorities and let them maintain the peace on behalf of the world.

Indcoup has drawn a massive 22 comments (at last count) on being awoken at 4:30am.

Jakartass as usual has the people at heart and is appealing for help in the latest disaster to hit Indonesia.

Now a disclaimer...I have no idea, where the picture is from. It has arrived on my computer several times over the last few days. Variously titled as orginating from Indonesia, Nigera, Malaysia, China.

Does anyone know???

BUGGER

I'm bored bored bored!! Indcoup and Jakartass are just back from Holidays and now I am seriously jealous. Not that I can see any Holidays on the horizon for awhile .. bugger!

You can normally tell when you need a holiday. The motor bike thrill seekers aren't funny any more, the traffic jams lose their sense of being Indonesia's way of telling you to slow down and enjoy the view, that cheap tshirt that you bought that falls apart after the first wash becomes a major issue instead of you thinking it serves me right I knew what I was buying.

I think the vice prez has taken holidays too, as there have been no interesting little "homlies" issuing forth for the past view days....bugger!

So unless something really bizarre takes place in the next few hours, I am off to hunt Anony-mouses and try and work out the connection with the below and anything I have posted over the last week..bugger!


"what about deafeningly loud motorbikes? are u saying u do not or do tolerate religion?? "... huh?



But I will be back tomorrow...BUGGER

Strange Sad World

Tolerance: :

a. Sympathy or indulgence for beliefs or practices differing from or conflicting with one's own

b : the act of allowing something.


Indcoup is back from holidays in BEAUTIFUL Bali. He certainly hit the ground running. A quick post on the fun of living in a nation that has a majority Muslim population, in particular on the very early (say 4:30am) call to prayer has fired up the intolerant that sulk amongst us.

So far he has had a death threat (?) suggested he move to a Christian province, told he is intolerant and one comment refered to the sounds that come from a Hindu Temple as Troll Music... WELCOME BACCCCCCCCCCCKK.

Still on tolerance, Members of the Salamullah religious sect lead by Lia Aminuddin who I have spoken about before
here have reported another death threat. Sheesh..Lia believes she is both the Angel Gabriel and the reincarnation of the Virgin Mary, which is worth a chuckle but a death threat..get real! Puts Indcoup in strange company to say the least.

People like her are what gives the city its character, nothing like a good natured nutter to make you smile.

Meanwhile, Cowards are blowing up trains in India, Rockets are being fired into Israel, Israel is using tanks and planes in return.

Religion...for the final word today I shall leave it to Henry Mencken

"Religion is fundamentally opposed to everything I hold in veneration - courage, clear thinking, honesty, fairness, and, above all, love of the truth."

SOCCER FREAKS

I still think that any sport that requires the amputation of half your limbs and then play an entirely different game to decide the world champion (penalty shootout ..What is that sh#t???)is just bizarre.

However, to show that there are no hard feelings against the SOCCER freaks. I thought this photo involved a tad of humour. Still best wishes to the Italians and I reckon the other Olypmic diving teams are worried as well now.

And now back to real sports, where if you knock a man down he stays down!

Viagra and Trolls

I think I have been violated!!!!! I was out troll hunting last night and what should I come across not one but two links to www.greenstumpff.com and www.greenstumps.com... Hmpf!! Cannot access the sites yet, so not sure who or what they are! Never-the-less Rex the cyber-ferret is on the job, he has also done a good job tracking a couple of annoying spam trolls.

I feel so used..grin... These are probably the same mongrels who let the cat out of the bag that I have "may" (personally I dispute that, but then I would wouldn't I) have small penis. This piece of evil gossip prompts all and sundry to send me email telling me how I can add 4 inches in just 4 days (now thats gotta hurt, what do you do tie a brick to it) or better yet a flood of emails like this...

"Even if you have no erectin problems SOFT CIAzLIS would help you to make BETTER SE X MORE OFTEN! and to bring unimagnable plesure to her.
Just disolve half a pil under your tongue and get ready for action in 15 minutes."

Now why would I buy Cialis (?) via the internet anyway. Even if I did want/need/desire the said drug, it is available along with Viagra over the counter at all Apotiks in Indonesia (Pharmacy/Chemist)anyway.

Now before all you cynics launch and say "how do you know that?"

I am innocent (in most things anyway). Last time I had the flu, I popped into the said Apotik bought some cough syrup. Sure enough, along will the usual hard sell of the various vitamins, the beautiful young thing asked "Would you like some Viagra with that?"

HUH?? Viagra with a purchase of cough syrup???..hmmm still puzzling the connection and its not a nice mental picture.

Still it is nice to get away from the Doctor Mafia who get a cut on every scrip they write.

Thus ends todays post, a mixed grill of penises (or is it penii) trolls, viagra and spam..

BTW I can do you a good deal on the jacket pictured, I am thinking on teaming up with Indcoup's special Tiara tshirt on this (now there is a connection!!!)

I'll do the jacket and he can supply the Indcoup special
Tiara Lestari T-shirt. ...(ok, ok I can't find the exact post but you get the idea)

LOUSY DAYS, ROTTEN NIGHTS

NOT HAPPY

"Some people are like Slinkies . . . Not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs."

What a sh@tty day!!..Ever have one of those days where you just want to explain to someone that their only reason for existence on the planet is as a sound argument for use of condoms...

But Nooooo..For the sake of peace and a sound business relationship, I shall swallow my pride yet again and it tastes like crap! I shall then make apologies for our obvious failings and move on...aaaghh!

Just another day to lose more faith in human nature (my own included I guess).

On the subject on human nature, I was surprised at the number of comments on the traffic fine issue here but none on masked men(?) beating women, I wonder why? People are scared? Don't care? Don't believe? or perhaps thinking if we ignore the issue, it will just go away? Another sh#ty little mystery for the human condition.

Anyway as you can gather I have a bad case of the grumps today..So this is all I am posting..

Gone a'droving

Sometimes working saturdays, I think I would like to change my job..perhaps go 'a-droving'

Clancy of the Overflow.

"I am sitting in my dingy little office, where a stingy
Ray of sunlight struggles feebly down between the houses tall,
And the foetid air and gritty of the dusty, dirty city
Through the open window floating, spreads its foulness over all.

And in place of lowing cattle, I can hear the fiendish rattle
Of the tramways and the buses making hurry down the street,
And the language uninviting of the gutter children fighting,
Comes fitfully and faintly through the ceaseless tramp of feet.

In my wild erratic fancy visions come to me of Clancy
Gone a-droving “down the Cooper” where the Western drovers go;
As the stock are slowly stringing, Clancy rides behind them singing,
For the drover’s life has pleasures that the townsfolk never know."


Of course, if I wanted a really interesting job, I could apply to be Vice President Kalla's Public Relations Representative. As we know the Vice President does have a way with words. Most recently, The Vice President was
quoted today defending a recent Indonesian business organisations trip to Israel as saying

" "Arabs, Egypt and Jordan also engage in trade relations with Israel. Many Palestinians are working in Israel. Maybe the goods that we buy from Israel are made by the Palestinians. So I do not see any problem in it,"

Of course, if you happen to be an athelete who had trained your whole life to be the best at your chosen sport then apparently you can expect a different level of support from the government.

"JAKARTA, Indonesia (AP) -- Indonesia pulled out of a planned Fed Cup
tennis match in Israel to protest that country's actions in the Gaza Strip, a foreign ministry spokesman said Tuesday."

For some bad news Vice President Kalla is going to have to improve if he wants to win the big "He didn't really say that did he" Masters Trophy. A late challenger is
Russian President Vladimir Putin who when ask we he was photographed kissing a
young boys stomach said "I wanted stroke him like a kitten".

Well thats alright then..for second I thought you were behaving a little weird...

SHAME ON US ALL

Some days I feel ashamed to be part of the human race!

Friskodude has posted this picture of a Caning in Aceh along with some words on the issue. Which makes him a far better man than I..words with fail me.

TAX KULIT

It would appear some people have enjoyed my slide down the slippery slope of
high principles. With a theme emerging in the comments section, that I should have gone to court and paid the fine.

Ok I have to confess some ignorance here, during my time in-country I have managed to avoid the legal process (more due to good luck than good management some would say). Seriously, what is the official process for a fine for not wearing a seatbelt? Surely not court as 'Anon' says in comments to the post? If court the only way, then previous experience with any kind of Indonesian Officialdom scares me. It is bound to be a long, drawn out, expensive experience. Anyway I will leave that to others to advise me on what the official process is?

Then Indonesia Anon was concerned that my use of the term "TAX KULIT" (skin tax) inferred that Indonesians are racists.

In fact, that was not the intention (by the use of this term) at all. It is fairly common term amongst expatriates to explain a common Indonesian free market principle to charge what the market will bear (As does the rest of the free market world). Naturally a "bule" with his supposedly (?) higher income can afford to pay more than the day to day national customer. The Tax Kulit Principle is also applied to Indonesian Chinese as well, who again are viewed rightly or wrongly with having a higher disposable income.

On the flip side, those of us with KITAS (Work, Long term stays permits etc) can get fansastic discounts are virtually all hotel and motels across Indonesia.

As for the dark and potentially dynamite side of the question are Indonesians Racists? In my experience towards outsiders, the answer is generally no. However and I am not sure if the best term to use is racism ..internally towards each other..that is certainly debatable.

Traffic Fines

Bugger...!!!! As discussed before, its a long fall from the moral high ground.

I fell off the mountain yesterday and joined the Hypocrites. Calmly minding my own business, I was rounded up by the local constables for not wearing a seat belt (as the bemo bus rips past with 6 people hangine out the door..grin).

As always, you are offered two choices ..official or "Ok Pak Saya bisa bantu" (Ok Mr, I can help).

To cut a long story short, the help started at 200,000Rp which quickly came down once it was established that I could speak Indonesian. Eventually,it was decided that 50,000Rp which is about $5 was fair. The normal rate local rate is 15,000 to 30,000 but there is always the Tax Kulit (Skin Tax..you are westerner therefore costs more) to factor in.

Suffice to say, in a very short time on my way again.

BUGGER, BUGGER .. Time to climb that morale mountain again..oh well never said I was perfect just expect others to be. Meanwhile, Indonesia Anonymus has a "mommy" who fell off that same moral mountain

Indonesia Playboy (s) and Marriage

A couple of interesting links for a Sunday

Jan 28 2006.

Vice President Jusuf Kalla says the government disagrees with a plan to launch an Indonesian version of Playboy magazine. Kalla has eagerly jumped on the crowded anti-Playboy bandwagon. "From the government’s point of view, we disagree with Playboy's publication," he was quoted as saying Friday (27/1/06) by state news agency Antara.

30 June 2006.

INDONESIA'S vice-president has said he sees nothing wrong in Arab men paying local women to marry, then divorcing them days or hours later, and suggested the practice -dismissed by critics as legalised prostitution - could boost tourism.

Jusuf Kalla made the off-the-cuff remarks at a travel industry seminar on how to attract more Arab visitors to Indonesia.

No Comment from me...Nuff said I think

Guantanamo, Refugees and Indonesia

It’s a quiet Sunday first time in a long while, not a thousand things to do (yea I know I have been told a million times not to exaggerate). So today a slow lazy introspective post.

Firstly, I have been accused of (in one way or another) of being overly critical or one sided when talking about Indonesia. Well that would be and is true! It will indeed be a rare thing for me to comment places like America or Australia etc. There are thousands of bloggers already doing a far better job than me on those places. For instance you want a view of Australia for the left try here, or from the right try here, for America try…naggh bugger it, they are loud enough on their own without any encouragement from me.

But for today only, the stump offers up the following cartoon.



Be under no doubt the creation of special “zones of exclusion” to prevent refugees from accessing the legal process in Australia is perfidious and evil and Guantanamo is a long fall from the moral high ground. Then again the curent attempt by Australian Prime Minister Howard to change Australian Refugee laws to effectivly block Papuan Refugees is pathetic appeasement to the Indonesian ruling class of the most base level.

So I will continue to comment on what I see in Indonesia and the region and sorry all, I afraid the defence they do worse elsewhere just “doesn’t wash”

Have nice day and have a chuckle at this one

Hypocrisy 2 Tolerance & Decency 0

Such evil deeds could religion prompt.
Lucretius (96 BC - 55 BC),


Hypocrisy: A feigning to be what one is not or to believe what one does not; especially : the false assumption of an appearance of virtue or religion.


Well above the average, but I am going for two posts today. I wasn’t going to but after reading today’s Jakarta Post. (I really need to find another paper, it used to be funny now its just depressing) I had no choice.

The Indonesian constitution and reputation (?) for tolerance took another big hit yesterday. Religious sect leader Lia Aminuddin was sentenced to jail for two years on Thursday for blasphemy.

Now there is no doubt in my mind that Lia is a couple of tools short in the toolbox. Lia believes she is she both the Angel Gabriel and the reincarnation of the Virgin Mary, kooky but that’s her business not the states. Lets tell the truth here, half the nutters in the world are convinced they are speaking to or for the one true God. As long as I can read my paper in peace, they can claim to be the reincarnation of Vanilla Ice for all anyone should care. If you want to follow them fill ya boots and have fun on the way just leave the rest of us in peace.

Meanwhile Azyumardi Azra, rector of Syarif Hidayatullah commenting on Lia's verdict said according to the JP that “he believed the verdict was inevitable because Lia had mixed ideas from established religions”

Wow, if ever there was a comment that indicates you like leading with your chin. Which religion established or otherwise doesn’t do that. Shall we talk of the origins of Easter, or….

Meanwhile, the intolerant ascending have decided that with everything that is going on in this country the most important thing is to
prosecute Kartika Oktavina Gunawan, who posed as the centerfold in the first Indonesian Playboy.

Her crime..she showed her breasts..well no …her groin..well no….she showed her …….Shock Horror..her mid riff. We can thank a group called ‘MAPPI’, Indonesian Anti-Piracy and Pornography (Does anyone really know who they are and who they represent) for filing the lawsuit against Kartika in the first place. On the other side of the coin is this the best thing the police have to do with their time?

You see, these days Tolerance in Indonesia is just a word in low demand and currency. Now if you want a really good strong word, try Hypocrisy!. Indonesia is currently well overstocked on the word these days and can offer great deals and specials. You might want to try the Hypocrisy and Intolerance Special comes with its own ranting, barely literate lunatics, great fun at any party.

Anyway I am off to buy some copies of Playboy and leave them around to see if any of the pious reads them, should be interesting.

CONDOM SATAN

Is there something in the water or is it a collective psychosis or has the world gone mad! I don't claim to be particularly religious, never the less I remember when I thought religion, I visulised people like Mother Teresa.

Perhaps things were simpler then, maybe because I didn’t know that Satan hides in condoms and soccer balls. Tricky little fellow that Satan! How do I know Satan hides in a condom? Well because a letter to the Jakarta Post told me so, along with the new scientific fact that the aids virus can penetrate condom material (where do they get this stuff?).

As for Soccer Ball hiding Satan: Read it for yourself
here and make sure you get to the bit about the earrings. Its important! Luckily “OVAL” balls never got a mention, so I can exploit that loophole.

Still it’s pleasing to know that both Christians and Muslims (and the rest, sorry if I have not offended you yet, give me time) are so concerned about the path we travel. I have to be honest, I think the road is getting a tad narrow for humans beings and it is costing way too many lives in the name of insantity.

BTW…I am still a bit stunned that in this day and age someone could seriously argue against the use of condoms…..We are an incredibly stupid species and why any God would want anything to do with us would be a better question to ask.

HOT JAVA ANYONE

Thought you would be smart and buy some land at Muria, Central Java. Well the government has literally dealt your plans a death blow Announcing yesterday plans to speed up the development of nuclear power plant in that location . The people of Muria must be beside themselves with joy!!

I have discussed the sheer insanity of this before and Jakartass tackles the topic even better here . He asks some very important questions such as who exactly is to benefit from this??? ..It won't be the people that's for sure.

If the "powers that be" insist on playing the insanity card to make some pollies and businessmen rich at the expense of the well being of the nation, then
Ngruki, comes to mind (ok I am just being nasty).

One can only hope people start to realise there are bigger things to worry about than playboy magazine.

As for nuclear waste.............

There go da Judge

Only the man who has enough good in him to feel the justice of the penalty can be punished. ~William Ernest Hocking

You have to love this.....

"The total amount allegedly received by my client was Rp 10 million, and that was the witness' money, not from the state. So, why should my client be fined Rp 200 million?"

"The judge mentioned something about the spirit to eradicate corruption by preventing losses to the state. The problem is, the state suffered nothing."

I was wondering what to write about today and along comes lawyer Firman Wijaya with this statement after the South Jakarta District Court jailed one of its judges for four years and six months for extorting money from a witness in a graft trial. You can read the actual article in the Jakarta Post here

There is so much bizarre about Wijaya's statement as reported it beggars belief..
"The graft was only worth 10 million why should my client have to pay 200 Million??"

I dunno How about abuse of trust and position just for starters?

"The problem is, the state suffered nothing." Mmm, I would have thought the state suffered a loss of public confidence, a loss of the rule of law, a loss of investor confidence, domestic and international embarrassment. I am sure there are a million more (200 million?).

Personally, I don't know what the procedure is in Indonesia but surely Wijay's comments alone are worthy of internal review in their own right.

Reminds me of an old joke "What do you call a 100 Lawyers on the bottom of the ocean" Answer: "A good start"

Most men's anger about religion is as if two men should quarrel for a lady that neither of them care for. ~George Savile, Marquess de Halifax

Still enjoying the Jakarta Post (always good for a laugh), there is a interesting reader's letter complaining about the creeping Christianization of Indonesia including the classic statement:

"There has been aggressive proselytizing by Christian missionaries in hospitals and schools, and there also have been objections to the teaching of other faiths in privately run missionary schools"

I confess, I have a problem with any faith that tries to ram its belief down someone throat (ok, Seventh Day Adventists are cool, because you can tease them so much when they come knocking uninvited to your front door and they dress so dorky). However to complain that privately run missionary schools don't exactly encourage the teaching of other faiths, is a interesting use of the logical thought processes.

Who was the last person who sent their child to "Pesantren" (Islamic boarding School)
for a Christian education.

Of course, our estwhile letter writer quotes some detailed statistics however I would more interested in how you compile any viable census type data in Indonesia. I cannot even find out what the population of Jakarta is, with anything resembling confidence.

What is it about religion that so often removes the ability to apply rational thought? In case you were wondering, "I believe in God; I just don't trust anyone who say they work for him".

Creation Proofs?

One of the joys of living in Indonesia that with a bit of effort you can find places that must represent what the original Eden was like. For those of you that care, have a look where I have spent the last few weeks.

Of course in the Ying and Yang of the world for every thing of beauty in creation there has to be the balance in creation gone wrong

Ya Pak

After returning from a recent trip, I took a speed read of the blogshpere. It was interesting to see the reaction to a post by Indcoup describing the lack of manners by some Indonesians when dealing others they believe below their station. A classic comment by one reader was “my colleagues in my office always say 'tolong' and 'terima kasih' to our office boys and girls, even to the janitors in our office”

What even to the Janitor?? How generous, sort of makes his point really.

Knowing my own tenous grip on life, and the somewhat irritating habit of whomever is the comic controller to throw spanner into my life when things are going well. I tend to stick to great grand pappies advice “be nice to people on the way up, you will probably pass them on the back down”

Personally, I have always found the other side of that particular coin far more perplexing. That is, the excessive Indonesian politeness when dealing with anyone perceived to be of higher(?) status. It does not seem matter how corrupt, evil or morally bankrupt that person may be. It never ceases to amaze me that when dealing with that all to common corrupt government official, even in the mist of an obvious shake down, the “shaked” will still be throwing out the “Yes Paks” with gay abandon (can you still say that??)and little concern for personal dignity.

I am not sure if this is a hang over from Javanese Culture or a hang over from the times of the “New Order” when getting on the wrong side of the ruling elite (no matter how low of the “elite” chain) could have some seriously bad consequences. Still, I can’t help but think how much more effective it would be if those corrupt parasites that are draining this country dry were greeted with a spit on the ground instead of the half bow and the simpering “Yes Pak.

Oh and I have to throw this in, even though it has nothing to do with the above post. Just listening to “The Simpsons” (Ah Fox TV!). Homer Simpson “Those Catholics, its like Simon Sez with no winner”

Catholics don’t to be offended, to be fair they went on to give everyone else a hard time as well.

World Cup Yawns

Well I have tried and failed!! I really cannot get into the world cup despite the world wide frenzy surrounding it. I even watched three games..sort of, although drifted off to sleep each time. It is beyond me how anyone can find a game that mucks around for 2 hours (or so) and then ends in a nil all draw can be called exciting.

Little wonder soccer crowds have a reputation for aggressive and violent behaviour (as opposed to the world cup players, who seem to fall over screaming the the moment anyone comes within 1/2 a metre of them). The crowds must suffer terminal frustration and boredom.

Thank God, with a bit of effort you can still find some rugby, AFL or even Gridiron with a bit of dedicated channel surfing (as my grand dad used to say, if it don't draw blood, it aint a sport..mind you he was a hard bastard).

Of course at the moment, soccer fever is running high in Australia. Amongst a lot of huberious and grandisose claims, the silliest claim is soccer will be the major code in Australia soon. The reality is, soccer will fall straight back to a dismal third (fourth?) as it is now.

Australia has had soccer fever before, the last time when they qaulified for the World Cup in the 70's (I forget who they beat, Outer Mongolia or someone). Sure enough within six months, the federation had split along predicatable enthnic lines and the code collapased once again into the abyss of boring sports.

So for you soccer nuts..have fun...I am off to the RUGBY.

DEATH BY POWERPOINT

Once again, I have been remiss in my postings and will continue to do for the next couple of weeks. Its that end of year thing where I have to justify my existence to the commercial "powers that be".

Over the next two weeks, meetings in Indonesia, Singapore and Malaysia. Lots of talking, new buzz words and smiling at very dull people. I think this year the words will be Six Sigma.. oh dear..here we go again and I still have not got rid of those stupid beads from Total Qaulity Management (You would know what I mean if you had ever been dragged from a real job dealing with real people to suffer through those presentations delivered by consultants who had no idea what you did or why you did it).

6 Sigma... "A transformational road to improvement utilising a framework of tools and methodologies" ...What a bunch of WANK!

However, as I am just one of the cogs in the machine, I will dutifully go and listen to the over charging consultants and bear with the slow death by power point slide..
and day dream of smogy Jakarta, bizarre Kalimantan, Beautiful Bandung, Bouncy Bali.

Wish me luck and I will see in in a a couple of weeks...

Jakarta Contrasts

Took a little trip into the big smoke (Jakarta) last weekend. Its a place I like to visit from every so often to get those things you just can't get in the provinces.

At 6'1, I am a bit bigger then the average Indonesian, so getting shoes and clothes that fit can be an interesting exercise at the best of times and Jakarta is often the last option. As usual, I had plenty of time to admire the view from the airport to city centre as a bus breakdown meant the normal 1 hour tollroad run took just over three hours.

Flew in via Garuda, the national Airline and took the time to read the Garuda in-flight Magazine. There was a fairly large section promoting Jakarta, mostly informative but where in the world did they get those photos of a smog free Jakarta??? No traffic jams, blue sky, lots of green, I must have missed that day! Whenever I am in Jakarta even on clear (?) days, the city is bathed in a very weird yellow tinge..sort of an "end of days" glow. You get the feeling the city is (has) entering an end game of terminal pollution meltdown.

Having said all that, Jakarta has a lot going for it as well. Some for the best food in the world, try Oasis or Lan Na Thai you won't de disappointed or duck down to the nearest Kaki Lima (street vendor) for some real down to earth tastes (stick to the fried stuff and you won't get sick). Personally, I love the Padang food and the way they serve it up.

Some of the malls are just bizarre in scope and size . There ia a night life scene that caters for all tastes and wants ranging from very up market clubs to downright sleazy. Best of all, a live music scene that is second to none and is easily affordable to most. One thing though, for some reason all the bands seem to come from Bandung (is there something in the water there?).

Hotel/Motels range from Hilton class five star to rent by the hour flea pits. Mind you, it might be ok to stay at the Hilton bit it seems a risky place to work at times as a poor young waiter found out here

"In the early hours of New Year’s Day 2005 Sutowo’s youngest son, Adiguna, was arrested in the bar of the Hilton Hotel, Jakarta. According to witnesses, when the woman with whom he was drinking had her expired credit card returned by a young part-time waiter, the young Sutowo said, ‘Don’t you know who I am?’, and then pulled a gun and shot the waiter dead. He was found guilty of murder, but received only a seven-year gaol term, much less than that of the well-known Australian drug smugglers."

Great movie houses can be found in Jakarta, I went saw the "Insider" in fanastic comfort. I must confess still confused about the movie, I must have missed a couple of twists somewhere.

All in all a great weekend but as usual I was left pondering the vast difference between the "haves" and "have nots". I know all cities have them but in Jakarta it is right in your face, walk 50m from your plush, air conditioned hotel and suddenly you are looking at people with no hope, no future and nowhere to go. I don't claim to have the answers by any means but it is confronting to say the least.

Earthquakes and old thugs

Went away for a couple of weeks and it looks like a lot has been happening.

The Indonesian city of Yogyakarta coped it in the neck with a massive earthquake with latest reports indicating close to 6000 people confirmed dead. Once again it appears the poorest and most disadvantaged have suffered more than their share of pain and grief. If you want to help Jakartass
has a number of links where your assistance would be appreciated.

Ex Indonesian Province East Timor has once again fallen into violence and chaos. This was once claimed by that most useless of organisations the United Nations as its jewel in Nation building. Unfortunately, with some notable personal exceptions, the 12 month postings of under qualified, over paid dreamers was never going to establish those functions needed to ensure a safe and secure society. Saddled with the inept UN combined with the sheer lunacy of decisions primarily driven by the dated Marxist Prime Minister Mari Alkatiri, the new nation never had a chance. An interesting viewpoint on the Timor crisis can be found here

An Indonesian family has lost several members to “bird Flu”. In a strange twist it was reported in the Jakarta Post this week that several people in village are blaming black magic for the deaths as no chickens have got sick.

Just to change the tone a bit, EX Prime Minister of Malaysia, Old Man Mahathir is finding out that nobody really cares for ex thugs once the power is withdrawn.
"He's been complaining about being isolated from the mainstream media," Malaysiakini.com
boss Premesh Chandran told Reuters, explaining that the major dailies that once hung on Mahathir's every word now didn't have much time for him.

Its beautiful isn’t it, you can rule a nation with respect or with fear but only one lasts. NEXT..................



On personal note, our Troll has been a bit naughty, leaving comments under false names, mine included. Pity shall be the order of the day, must be sad little life one leads as a Troll if you need to pretend you are someone else.